Men at Arms - Terry Pratchett [130]
*It has probably been gathered that although Leonard da Quirm was absolutely the greatest technological genius of all time, he was a bit of a Detritus when it came to thinking up names.
*It didn’t need to. Cuddy, belonging to a race that worked underground for preference, and Detritus, a member of a race notoriously nocturnal, had excellent vision in the dark. But mysterious caves and tunnels always have luminous fungi, strangely bright crystals or at a pinch merely an eldritch glow in the air, just in case a human hero comes in and needs to see in the dark. Strange but true.
*Rather like British Rail
*Which can mean…well…meanings include: “Pardon me, you’re hanging from my rubber ring, thank you so very much”, “It may be just vital biomass oxygenating the planet to you, but it’s home to me” and “I’m sure there was a rain forest around here a moment ago.”
*Who stoked the boiler.
*Five more embraced it as a holy weapon and instructed that it be used on all infidels, heretics, gnostics and people who fidgeted during the sermon.
*It runs: “He who chains down a troll, especially taking advantage of the situation to put the boot in a few times, had better not be the one who unchains it again.”
*And was the origin, long after the events chronicled here were over, of an Ankh-Morpork folk song scored for tin whistle and nasal passage:
“As I was a-walking along Lower Broadway,
The recruiting party came picking up people by their ankles and saying they were going to volunteer to join the Watch unless they wanted their goohuloog heads kicked in,
So I went via Peach Pie Street and Holofernes instead,
Singing: Too-ra-li, etc.”
It never really caught on.
*To trolls, heaven is below.
Table of Contents
Cover
Title Page
Contents
Begin Reading
About the Author
Praise
Other Books by Terry Pratchett
Copyright
About the Publisher