Middle East - Anthony Ham [541]
One other advantage, and it’s one which you should exploit to the full, is that it’s often perfectly acceptable for a woman to go straight to the front of a queue or to ask to be served first before any men who may be waiting!
That’s not to say that everything is perfect. Far from it. Sexual harassment is a problem worldwide and the Middle East is no exception. Harassment can come in many forms: from stares, muttered comments and uncomfortably close contact on crowded public transport, to the difficulty of eating in public on your own, where you may receive endless unwanted guests – even the wandering hands of waiters can be a problem. Women also report being followed and hissed at by unwanted male admirers on a fairly regular basis.
That said, although ‘mild’ harassment can be common in some countries, physical harassment is rare and sexual harassment is considered to be a serious crime in many Middle Eastern countries. In fact, incidents of sexual assault or rape are far lower in the region than in the West. It’s also true that, contrary to prevailing stereotypes, the treatment of foreign women can be at its best in more conservative societies, providing, of course, you adhere to the prevailing social mores.
The treatment of women can also be a factor of age: older women will find they are greatly respected. As one seasoned Middle Eastern expat and traveller told us, she was so traumatised after travelling in Israel as a 21-year-old that she took up karate. Now in her forties, she’s been going back to the region ever since. ‘I realise the older I get, the less harassment I receive,’ said, and she’s now ‘wonderfully relieved I’ve reached that age where I can have a meaningful conversation with men without inviting other expectations. Having a husband is also immensely useful!’
What to Do When You’re There
What sort of experience you have will depend partly on situations beyond your control, but also on your reaction to them. Expatriate women and those who’ve travelled extensively throughout the region maintain that the most important thing is to retain your self-confidence and sense of humour. Another recurring theme is that you should always be alert, but a certain detachment can be an equally powerful weapon: ignoring stares and refusing to dignify suggestive remarks with a response generally stops unwanted advances in their tracks.
It may be unfair, even discriminatory in the eyes of many travellers, but how women travellers dress will, considering the stereotypes at large in the region, go a long way towards determining how you’re treated. To you, short pants and a tight top might be an expression of your right to do whatever the hell you want. To many local men, your dress choice will send an entirely different message, confirming the worst views held of Western women.
The best way to tackle the stereotypes is to visibly debunk them: in other words, do as the locals do, dress and behave more modestly than you might at home and always err on the side of caution. As with anywhere, take your cues from those around you: if you’re in a rural area and all the women are in long, concealing dresses, you should be conservatively dressed.
Dressing ‘modestly’ really means covering your upper legs and arms, shoulders and cleavage. A scarf is also useful, both to cover your neckline and to slip over your head when you