Middle of Everywhere - Mary Bray Pipher [111]
But, by the next week, Joseph had bought a car with the help of Sudanese friends. He now had the extra financial burden of a monthly car payment. In spite of his poverty, Joseph was a responsible car owner. Insurance cost him almost a thousand dollars every six months, but he bought it. And he passed his driver's test. He became one of the main drivers for people in the Sudanese community. Jim taught him how to check the oil.
A couple of weeks later Joseph proudly showed us a pay stub. Jim taught him basic bookkeeping and stressed he must never write more checks than he had money to cover. We helped him formulate a budget. Joseph was making $1,100 a month. Abraham had lost his job when the spring semester ended and the sorority women went home. Joseph's salary supported four people and his car, and soon he would need to pay our government $200 a month to repay the cost of four plane tickets to America. The government no longer helped with food stamps and there was barely enough money for food. Joseph said, "We do not eat much."
I was angry when I looked at the numbers. Joseph had been deprived of a childhood and now he was locked into an adulthood working difficult jobs for less than a livable wage. I wished our country would make it a little easier for him and his family. At the very least, we shouldn't be charging them for their plane tickets. If they paid that bill, they would go hungry for many months. And they had to pay it, or their refugee status could be compromised.
Postscript
Eight months after their arrival, the family is adjusting to Nebraska. They are leaders in the Sudanese community and they help newcomers from Kakuma fit in. Their apartment is often filled with people who have stopped by for a visit or to ask for help. I am honored to be their friend.
Joseph works long hours, drives many Sudanese to their job interviews and dental appointments, and pursues his GED. I have yet to see him angry, rude, or upset with anyone. He has, however, taken up smoking.
Abraham has successfully completed a year of high school. He is popular at school and in the Sudanese community. He wants to go to college and become a policeman. Right now he is looking for a summer job.
Martha is learning to read. Her English has improved greatly and she is the star of her sewing class. She has developed a fondness for fried chicken, red soda pop, and orange "lemons." We have a close relationship. Martha said to me, "I am always happy with you. I pray to God all the time that He will make you happy."
Paul plays basketball and loves to swim. He had one bike stolen but was given another one by Mad Dads. He likes pizza, Pepsi, and Zesto ice-cream cones. He recently worked a day for a neighbor and was paid his first American money. He immediately spent the twenty dollars on a video game.
I worry the most about Paul, who is young and easily influenced. His older siblings are busy and he has too much un-supervised free time. The family lives next door to a halfway house for registered sex offenders and men recently released from prison. Paul spends his days wandering around the neighborhood. He might as well be wearing a T-shirt with VULNERABLE written on it. I am worried bad company will find him. This summer he is in summer school and day camp. I hope that is enough structure to protect him until he returns to school in the fall.
The Kakuma refugees are wonderful people with almost all the attributes of resilience. They are survivors on a level I can hardly imagine. However, even as I admire and cherish them, I worry about their future. They have been terribly traumatized and their history is one of physical and developmental deprivation. They are young and have missed many of the lessons that parents teach their children. They come from a culture as different from ours as is possible. Most of what they do know about the world isn't useful here.
Furthermore, their external environment in Nebraska is harsh. The bleak situation is that a twenty-two-year-old, utterly unprepared