Mila 18 - Leon Uris [115]
“Wolf, you’re disappointed.”
“Just at myself. Candidly speaking, I’m not one for fancy talking.” He stood up slowly, towering over her. “I have missed you,” he managed to say. Rachael leaned against him slightly and he put his arm around her shoulders. Her arms found their way about him and she began to tremble, and as they held each other close the terrible uneasiness inside them ebbed. Wolf audibly gulped and sighed with relief. They searched each other out and kissed and then they were both calm.
Rachael and Wolf stood before the window, watching darkness come. They looked down on the street, and from this height they could see beyond the wall into the “Polish corridor” which separated the big and little ghetto and they could see the dome of the forbidden Tlomatskie Synagogue. His arm was about her waist and her head was on his shoulder.
“This is wonderful,” Rachael said.
“It sure is.”
“You have become terribly handsome and mannish.”
Wolf shrugged. “Rachael, I meant all the things I wrote to you.”
“So did I. I know that now.” She pulled away from him. “Wolf ...”
“What?”
“Would you answer one thing, honestly?”
“Sure.”
“Did you have any girls on the farm?”
“Heck! What kind of a stupid question is that?”
“I think I’m a terribly jealous kind,” Rachael answered.
“I’m sure not much to be jealous about.”
“You didn’t answer me.”
“I messed around a little.” Then he added quickly, “But that was before we made promises.”
“Messed around?”
“You know, messed around.”
“More than ... kissing?”
Wolf patted his flat chest to demonstrate. “Messed around.”
“Oh.”
“Before we made promises.”
“Did you do any other things?”
“Rachael ...”
“I think I should know everything before we can be certain of our relationship. What else have you done?”
“Rachael, I’m a boy and boys are different, and if I tell you you’re liable to get very mad.”
“I’m sixteen, almost seventeen. I’ve been a woman for several years. I know about these things—I mean, Momma and I have had long talks about growing up.”
Wolf was flustered. Rachael was adamant.
“Wolf ...”
“What?”
“Have you ever ... done it?”
“You sure ask a lot of questions. This isn’t something a man wants to discuss with his girl.”
“If we are really sweethearts, the way we say we are, then there shouldn’t be any secrets.”
“I tried it once,” Wolf croaked. “Even before I went to the farm. It was on my birthday. My sixteenth—almost two years ago. You don’t want to hear about it.”
“Yes, I do.”
“Well, I was with three of my pals. One of them was older—he was nineteen—and he knew a woman in Solec. One of those kind of women.”
“What kind?”
“Who does it for money.”
“Oh ... one of those kind.”
“So, anyhow, it was my birthday and all that and we were at this guy’s house and he snitched a bottle of vodka from his parents’ liquor cabinet. I never drank before, except a sip now and then. I got to laughing and couldn’t stop. Then we started talking about ... things, and he said he knew this woman in Solec. Next thing you know, it was a dare and I was feeling pretty good.”
“And you went there?”
Wolf nodded.
“And you did?”
“Well, it wasn’t so hot I got scared as hell and I didn’t know what to do. Boy, I’ll bet you hate me now.”
“No. I admire your honesty. Now I know that you will always be honest with me.”
“You’re not mad?”
“Momma explained that certain things are very normal for boys—that is, men. And she says I should not suppress my emotions and feelings too much because that can lead to frustration.”
“She’s sure smart.”
“Sometimes I think she says it to me because she’s frustrated. I can feel that she hasn’t been too happy with Daddy.”
“That’s too bad. My folks are happy. Poppa doesn’t seem to need it too much because he works all the time, but I know he and