Mistakes Were Made - Carol Tavris [0]
Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts
Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson
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HARCOURT, INC.
Orlando Austin New York San Diego Toronto London
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Copyright © 2007 by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson
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“Frank and Debra” extract from Andrew Christensen and Neil S. Jacobson’s Reconcilable
Differences is © 2000 Guilford Press and is reprinted with permission of Guilford Press.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Tavris, Carol.
Mistakes were made (but not by me): why we justify foolish beliefs,
bad decisions, and hurtful acts/Carol Tavris & Elliot Aronson.—1st ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
1. Cognitive dissonance. 2. Self-deception. I. Aronson, Elliot. II. Title.
BF337.C63T38 2007
153—dc22 2006026953
ISBN 978-0-15-101098-1
Text set in Adobe Garamond
Printed in the United States of America
First edition
A C E G I K J H F D B
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To Ronan, my Wonderful O’
—Carol Tavris
To Vera, of course
—Elliot Aronson
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We are all capable of believing things which we know to be untrue, and then, when we are finally proved wrong, impudently twisting the facts so as to show that we were right. Intellectually, it is possible to carry on this process for an indefinite time: the only check on it is that sooner or later a false belief bumps up against solid reality, usually on a battlefield.
—George Orwell (1946)
A great nation is like a great man:
When he makes a mistake, he realizes it.
Having realized it, he admits it.
Having admitted it, he corrects it.
He considers those who point out his faults as his most benevolent teachers.
—Lao Tzu
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Contents
INTRODUCTION
Knaves, Fools, Villains, and Hypocrites:
How Do They Live with Themselves? 1
CHAPTER 1
Cognitive Dissonance: The Engine of Self-justification 11
CHAPTER 2
Pride and Prejudice … and Other Blind Spots 40
CHAPTER 3
Memory, the Self-justifying Historian 68
CHAPTER 4
Good Intentions, Bad Science:
The Closed Loop of Clinical Judgment 97
CHAPTER 5
Law and Disorder 127
CHAPTER 6
Love’s Assassin: Self-justification in Marriage 158
CHAPTER 7
Wounds, Rifts, and Wars 185
CHAPTER 8
Letting Go and Owning Up 213
AFTERWORD 237
ENDNOTES 239
INDEX 277
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Introduction
Knaves, Fools, Villains, and Hypocrites: How Do They Live with Themselves?
Mistakes were quite possibly made by the administrations in which I served.
—Henry Kissinger, responding to charges that he committed
war crimes in his role in the United States’ actions in
Vietnam, Cambodia, and South America in the 1970s
If, in hindsight, we also discover that mistakes may have been made … I am deeply sorry.
—Cardinal Edward Egan of New York, referring to the bishops
who failed to deal with child molesters among the Catholic clergy
Mistakes were made in communicating to the public and customers about the ingredients in our French fries and hash browns.
—McDonald’s, apologizing to Hindus and other vegetarians
for failing to inform them that the “natural flavoring”
in their potatoes contained beef byproducts
This week’s question: How can you tell when a presidential scandal is serious?
A. The president’s poll numbers drop.
B. The press goes after him.
C. The opposition calls for his impeachment.
D. His own party members turn on him.
E. Or the White House says, “mistakes were made”
—Bill Schneider on CNN’s Inside Politics
AS FALLIBLE HUMAN BEINGS, all of us share the impulse to