Mistress - Amanda Quick [99]
“They concluded that the bumbling country squire next door was unlikely to discover the truth.” Marcus glanced at his hands again. “They were right. To this day I sometimes wonder if I would ever have learned what a fool I had been if Nora had not miscarried the babe.”
“Surely you would have known the truth when the child was born several weeks too soon?”
“I doubt it. I told you, I knew little of such matters. I would have been informed that the infant was born prematurely and I would have wanted to believe it.”
“The rumors I heard said that Nora died of a fever.”
“She did. Six months after she lost the babe.”
“The duel,” Iphiginia whispered. “That was what the duel was all about, was it not? Shortly after Nora died, you went to London and challenged her seducer.”
“He told me I was a fool, which was no doubt true. He demanded to know what possible difference it all made now that the wench was dead. I did not give him any answers because I had none.”
“You defended your wife’s honor even though she had wronged you. Even though she was no longer alive.” Iphiginia felt a tear trickle down her cheek. “Marcus, that is so exactly like you.”
Marcus scowled. “Bloody hell. Are you crying?”
“No.” She gave a tiny sniff.
“I should hope not. The matter does not warrant tears.”
“But it does, Marcus. I feel sorry for both you and Nora. She must have been literally terrified when she discovered that she was ruined and pregnant.”
“Yes.”
“She was young and desperate. She was an innocent girl who had allowed herself to be seduced. She had broken one of Society’s strictest rules. She knew that she would have to pay a terrible price. So she turned to you, her childhood friend.”
“The thing is,” Marcus said, “I wanted her so much I would have taken her on any terms. I would have given her my name and claimed the babe as my own. If only she had not deceived me. That was what I could not forgive.”
“Because whenever you think back on her deception, you feel you played the fool.”
“I did play the fool.”
Iphiginia felt a chill in the pit of her stomach. She, too, had deceived him. He no doubt believed that he had played the fool with her, also.
She reached out and put her gloved hand on his leg. “Nora did not make a fool of you, Marcus. No one could do that. You behaved in a noble, chivalrous fashion. You avenged her honor and you kept her secret.”
“I had little choice in the matter. I could hardly reveal her dishonor without making myself appear a naive, gullible idiot.”
“I do not believe that it was the thought of appearing naive or gullible which bothers you the most about the past,” Iphiginia said. “I think it was the fact that you had given her your heart but she did not love you in return. You feel that she used you to save herself.”
“And so she did.”
“I will not quarrel with your conclusion,” Iphiginia said. “Nora was little more than a girl and she was no doubt hysterical with fear at the time. Her parents must have been equally frantic and desperate to save their daughter from utter ruin.”
“Yes.”
“Your marriage was begun under a dreadful cloud. You say that you were the virgin on your wedding night, but I think you were years older than Nora in all the ways that truly count. You had been obliged to grow up very quickly, after all. Nora, on the other hand, was barely out of girlhood.”
Marcus said nothing.
“Do you know what I think?” Iphiginia said. “I believe that if she had lived, Nora would have grown up and fallen deeply in love with you. She would have learned to love you when she was mature enough to comprehend your finer qualities.”
Marcus stared at her. “For an intelligent female, you sometimes spout the most outlandish nonsense. What in the name of the devil makes you believe such a ridiculous thing?”
She smiled. “Because I know how very easy it is to fall in love with you, my lord. Indeed, I have done so myself.”
FIFTEEN
MARCUS FELT AS THOUGH THE UNIVERSE HAD SHIFTED around him, leaving him in a different place than he had been a moment earlier. The light from the stars seemed to come from