Monster - A. Lee Martinez [78]
“That’s not fair!” she said.
Monster dug in his pocket and found another spell. He rolled it into a ball and hit her with it. Instantly, Ed started croaking like a toad. It didn’t really do anything to further impede her, but it cheered him.
Monster worked his way around the edge of the room to stay out of her reach as Ed continued to croak and Ferdinand flopped around on the floor. Ed would remain stuck to the floor until she touched her nose. Or a handsome prince came along and kissed her. He figured the nose thing was more likely. Either way, she was out of the way for a while.
The imp, its mouth full of red fur, hopped before Monster.
“Did you win?”
It barked and wagged its tiny tail.
“The kitchen’s this way,” said Chester.
“That wasn’t so hard,” said Monster.
“Don’t count your eggs yet,” said Chester. “You’ve been lucky.” He couldn’t argue. Ferdinand and Ed were dangerous, but he’d been prepared. If Lotus was still in the house, then she’d probably make short work of Monster and his weak magic. All the more reason to get out of here.
Judy was in the kitchen. She raised her head at Monster’s arrival. “Hi, how are you? Want some tea?”
She held out a saucer and cup. He knocked it away.
“A ‘No, thank you’ would’ve been sufficient,” she said.
“Come on.” He tried to pull her out of the chair, but she resisted.
“What’s your rush?” she asked. “Sit down. Have some tea.”
“I don’t want any tea.” He pushed the cup off the table.
“Why do people keep doing that?” Judy stood. “Now I’ll have to get another cup.”
The imp scrambled up onto the kitchen counter. It yapped and howled as it struggled to lift the stone beside the sink.
“I don’t think Mrs. Lotus would want you touching that,” said Judy.
Monster pressed a rune spell across Judy’s forehead. She went limp and fell into Monster’s arms. The paper wasn’t sticky, so he had to hold it in place. He lowered her the rest of the way to the floor, keeping the spell pressed to her forehead.
“Chester, find some tape or something.”
“You didn’t have to keep the rune pressed on the others,” said Chester as he rifled through the drawers.
“This is a different spell,” said Monster. “They don’t all follow the same rules.”
“I don’t know how you keep track of it all.”
“I don’t. That’s why I need my dictionary. I only remembered this one from my college days.”
Grinning, Judy giggled.
“Cheaper than weed,” said Monster.
“I’d heard getting high on magic can be dangerous,” said Chester.
“I handled it fine,” replied Monster. “Until the freakout. Now I never touch the stuff.”
“Never?”
“Okay, so maybe I’m getting a bit of a contact high, but there’s no way around that.”
“She’s already pretty buzzed from that tea,” said Chester. “Is it a good idea to mix the effects?”
“Not really.” Monster glanced down the hall and checked on Ferdinand’s progress. She was on her knees, taking in deep breaths and regaining her equilibrium. “How’s that tape coming?”
“No dice.”
“I can’t keep holding this…” Monster snapped his fingers to get Judy’s attention. “Hey, how you feeling there? Pretty good, right?”
“Peachy.” Her eyes crossed as she giggled.
“If you want to keep feeling peachy you’ll have to hold this in place. Can you do that?”
Judy nodded, and Monster lifted her hand to her forehead and let go. She kept the rune in contact. She didn’t resist as he helped her rise.
“We’re leaving now. How’s that sound?” asked Monster.
Judy nodded as her eyes nearly rolled back in her head. He slapped her lightly on the cheeks.
“Come on now. Stick with me. I can’t carry you out of here.”
The imp barked and continued its struggle with the stone slab.
“I think he wants us to take this with us,” said Chester.
“So take it. I don’t care.”
Chester grabbed the stone. He yelped as his paper body wilted and fell flat, floating to the floor. He slowly folded himself back into gnomish shape.
“Geez, that packed a punch.”
“What happened?”
“I don’t know. Touching it