Moving Pictures - Terry Pratchett [131]
Laddie’s tail thumped once or twice on the stones. Then he whimpered for a while, with longer and longer pauses between the sounds.
Then there was a faint noise. Just like bone on stone.
Gaspode’s ears twitched. He looked up at the advancing figure, visible even in utter darkness because it would forever be darker than mere blackness alone could manage.
He pulled himself upright, the hairs rising along his back, and growled.
“Another step and I’ll have your leg off and bury it,” he said.
A skeletal hand reached out and tickled him behind the ears.
There was a faint barking from the darkness.
“Good boy Laddie!”
Gaspode, tears pouring down his face, gave Death an apologetic grin.
“Pathetic, isn’t it?” he said hoarsely.
I WOULDN’T KNOW. I’VE NEVER BEEN THAT MUCH OF A DOG PERSON, said Death.
“Oh? Come to that, I’ve never liked the idea of dyin’,” said Gaspode. “We are dyin’, ain’t we?”
YES.
“Not surprised, really. Story of my life, dyin’,” said Gaspode. “It’s just that I fought,” he added, hopefully, “that there was a special Death for dogs. A big black dog, maybe?”
No, said Death.
“Funny that,” said Gaspode. “I heard where every type of animal had its own ghastly dark specter what come for it at the end. No offense meant,” he added quickly. “I fought there was this big dog that trots up to you an’ says, ‘OK, Gaspode, your work is done and so forth, lay down your weary burden, style of fing, and follow me to a land flowin’ with steak and offal.’”
NO. THERE’S JUST ME, said Death. THE FINAL FRONTIER.
“How come I’m seein’ you, if I ain’t dead yet?”
YOU’RE HALLUCINATING.
Gaspode looked alert. “Am I? Cor.”
“Good boy Laddie!” The barking was louder this time.
Death reached into the mysterious recesses of his robe and produced a small hourglass. There was almost no sand left in the top bulb. The last seconds of Gaspode’s life hissed from the future to the past.
And then there were none at all.
Death stood up.
COME, GASPODE.
There was a faint noise. It sounded like the audible equivalent of a twinkle.
Golden sparks filled the hourglass.
The sand flowed backward.
Death grinned.
And then, where he had been, there was a triangle of brilliant light.
“Good boy Laddie!”
“There he are! Told you I hear barking!” said the voice of Rock. “Good boy! Here, boy!”
“Cor, am I glad to see you—” Gaspode began. The trolls clustering around the opening paid him no attention at all. Rock heaved the pillar aside and gently lifted Laddie up.
“Nothing wrong that time won’t heal,” he said.
“Can we eat it now?” said a troll above him.
“You defective or something? This one heroic dog!”
“—’scuse me—”
“Good boy Laddie!”
Rock handed up the dog and climbed out of the hole.
“—’scuse me—” Gaspode croaked after him.
He heard a distant cheer.
After a while, since there didn’t seem to be much of an alternative, he crawled painfully up the sloping pillar and managed to drag himself out onto the rubble.
No one was around.
He had a drink out of a puddle.
He stood up, testing the injured leg.
It’d do.
And finally, he swore.
“Woof, woof, woof!”
He paused. That wasn’t right.
He tried again.
“Woof!”
He looked around…
…and color drained out of the world, returning it to a state of blessed blacks and whites.
It occurred to Gaspode that Harga would be throwing out the trash around now, and then there was bound to be a warm stable somewhere. And what more did a small dog need?
Somewhere in the distant mountains, wolves were howling. Somewhere in friendly houses, dogs with collars and dishes with their names on were being patted on the head.
Somewhere in between, and feeling oddly cheerful about it, Gaspode the Wonder Dog limped into the gloriously-monochrome sunset.
About thirty miles Turnwise of Ankh-Morpork the surf boomed on the wind-blown, seagrass-waving, sand-dune-covered spit of land where the Circle Sea met the Rim Ocean.
Sea swallows dipped low over the waves. The dried heads of sea-poppies clattered in the perpetual breeze, which scoured the sky of clouds and moved the sand around in curious patterns.
The hill