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'No.'

'And I've been working the decks, sampled a VIMbot earlier, which was mental.' I half raise my phone to transfuse him a copy of the Replica invite, but he's not keen. Never one for the social. 'And girls,' I add, cos I can't resist the dig at him nesting in this shithole, pre-demolition, twentyfour/seven by seven, getting it on only in Pluslife. 'Uh-huh. Maybe you could bring 'em round some time. Get me a piece of your pie. For once.'

'Sure, man. I'll do that.' And this is a lie deluxe and we both know it. Although at least it resolves the gender question of the nondescript baldy.

'Yeah, that'd be kif.'

'Kif like a spliff.'

'Want one?'

He tosses me a baggie of sugar, A-grade, and isn't it always the way that someone who never even fucking leaves the house should score the premium? I start rolling while he plugs into my data.

'You're way outdated.'

'So?'

'My clients won't dig that.'

'If I can get the shit, who cares about my track?'

'It's real competitive, Tobias. Real lucrative.'

I don't say anything. Lick the ends of the paper to fuse 'em together, which is a waste of effort when the paper's self-adherent, but fuck it. I light up, take a toke, and pass it on. Unathi takes a deep hit and shows no sign of passing it back.

'How about we start you off easy?'

'Whatever.'

'There's a new weapon in Nemesis Redux that everyone's after, but I doubt you're up for that right now. Doesn't look like you played it before either.'

'Fuck you. I can handle.'

'Uh-huh. How about Kiwi Pop?'

'What, the kid's game?'

'You'd be surprised how many parentals want to indulge their kiddies' every heart's desire. It's war out there, 'specially in virtual mutacute land.'

'Isn't there an age protection plugged in? Precisely to stop people like me from amokking among the kiddies?'

'Yeah, but I got a hack. Like candy, baby. How could you resist?'

'Exactly. I just wouldn't feel right.'

'Coming over all moral? Spare me.'

'Don't you have anything else?'

'How do you feel about meatspace? There are some interesting ARGs happening at the moment.'

'Alt reality? I don't know. Do I have to dress up?'

'You'd look so cute with pointy ears. Or fangs.' He wiggles his fingers in front of his mouth all nosferatu.

'Not a chance.'

'Okay, okay. There's a new title, just hit the market a couple of months ago. Scorpions Elite?'

'What's the concept?'

'Pseudo-cop shit. Mix of gamespace and meat. In game, it's busting heads, fragging bad guys, typical shooter. Real world is mainly detective work online, collaborating with wikis to solve clues, but also field action, shaking down informants kinda thing. It's quite kif, cos it's not only game employees, it's other players too. It ties into FallenCity Underworld, so you have other people playing bad guys. Oh yeah – and some gun battles in publisher-approved location. Although it might be too complex for you. Bit rof when you've been off the circuit so long.'

'Piss off, Unathi.'

'Yeah, I think we'll kick you off gently. Till you get a feel for it again. Here's your user ID.' He flips me a game token marked with Kiwi Pop's mascot, a pink and yellow dino-beastie thing with a toothsome grin and beady black eyes that goes by the name of Moxy. I only know this from too many afternoons spaced out with kiddies' TV.

'I got an order for a purple Blinka Stinka. It's worth two-eight. That's fourteen hundred to you. And yes, that means I'm taking 50%. It's a sliding scale. The rates will get better if you do.'

'I gotta tell you, Unathi, if I wanted to get fucked, I would have stayed in bed.'

'Yeah, screw you, Tobe. Purple, okay? Any other colour is not gonna cut it. It's somewhere on North Island, level six. Apparently. Shouldn't take you longer than a couple of hours.'

'Easy. But let's ask Moxy, shall we?' I flip the game token into the air and slap it down onto the back of my hand, heads or tails, Moxy or the game-co logo.