Mysteries - Knut Hamsun [146]
“I fall and fall, the light diminishes, it gets darker and darker around me; I can see the earth below and I recognize where I am—there are cities, wind and smoke. Then I stop. Looking around, I see ocean everywhere. My happy feeling is gone, I bump against the rocks and feel cold. There is a white sandy bottom under my feet, and above me I see nothing but water. I swim a few strokes and pass many strange plants, thick green foliage plants, marine flowers swaying back and forth on their stems-a a mute world where not a sound is heard but where everything lives and moves. Another few strokes take me to a coral reef. There were no corals anymore, the reef had been plundered, but I said to myself: Someone has been here before me! And I no longer felt so lonely, since someone had been there before. I start swimming again, hoping to hit land, but this time I take only a stroke or two before I stop. I stop because someone is lying on the bottom in front of me; it’s a woman, tall and thin, and she lies on a rock, badly cut up. As I touch her, I realize that I know her, but she’s dead, and I don’t understand how she can be, since I recognize her by the crucifix with the green stones. It’s the same woman I had recently followed through those long corridors with the numbered rooms. I want to swim on, but pause to straighten her out; she lies spread-eagled over a big rock, and it makes an uncanny impression on me. Her eyes are wide open, but I pull her to a white spot; I can see the crucifix around her neck and slip it under her dress so that the fishes won’t get at it. Then I swim away....
“The next morning I was told that the woman had died during the night. She had jumped into the sea outside the Chinese quarter ; they found her in the morning. However strange it might seem, she was dead. Perhaps I could meet her again if I tried! I thought. And I smoked opium a second time so I would meet her, but I didn’t meet her.
“How mysterious it all was! Something happened later on, too. I had come back to Europe, I was home. One warm night when I was wandering about, I came down to the harbor, to the pumping works, where I remained for a while listening to the talk aboard the ships. It was very quiet all around, the pumps weren’t running. Finally I grew tired, but I didn’t want to go home because it was so hot. I climbed the housing of one of the pumps and sat down. But the night was so still and warm, I couldn’t keep awake; soon I was fast asleep.
“I’m awakened by a voice calling me; looking down, I see a woman standing on the rocks. She’s tall and skinny; when the gas lamp flares up I can see that she’s very lightly clad.
“I say good evening.
“‘It’s raining,’ she says.
“‘Well, I don’t know whether it’s raining or not, but if it does one had better seek cover.’ And I scramble down from the pump housing. That very moment the pumps start rattling, a paddle turns in the air and disappears, another paddle turns in the air and disappears, the pumps are running. If I hadn’t gotten away in the nick of time, I would’ve been cut to pieces, completely crushed. That I understood right away.
“I look around me, and sure enough, a small rain begins to fall. The woman is walking away, I can see her in front of me; I knew her very well, she was still wearing the crucifix. I had recognized her from the beginning, but pretended I didn’t know her. Wanting to catch up with her, I walked for all I was worth; but I didn’t catch up with her. She didn