Mysteries - Knut Hamsun [99]
“I was at the Andresens’,” she said of a sudden.
“That may be; I did see you when you finally came. You weren’t alone, but I saw you quite clearly and greeted you under my breath from behind the rock. God knows what thoughts flashed through your mind at that moment, for you turned your head and glanced at the rock—”
“Now listen—. Why, you start as though I were going to read your death sentence—”
“But you are, I see that very well, your eyes turned ice-cold.”
“This must really come to an end, Mr. Nagel! If you think it over, you must see for yourself that you aren’t behaving very nicely toward the absent party either. Isn’t that so, if you put yourself in his place—quite apart from your making it so unpleasant for me? What do you want me to do? Let me tell you once and for all: I won’t break my promise, I love him. There, that ought to be clear enough. So be a little careful; I really can’t walk with you unless you show me some consideration. I’m telling you this straight out.”
She was upset; her lips quivered and she made every effort to hold back her tears. When Nagel remained silent she added, “You’re welcome to walk me home, all the way home, if you like, as long as you won’t make it uncomfortable for both of us. I would be grateful if you told me a story; I love to hear you talk.”
“Certainly,” he said promptly, in the loud, perfectly exultant voice of a windbag who could let himself go,3 “certainly, as long as I can come with you! I’ll make sure to—. Oh, how bracing, how you positively bolster me up when you’re angry with me.... ”4
For quite a while they talked about trivial matters. They were walking with small steps and so slowly that they made barely any progress.
“What fragrance, what fragrance!” he said. “Look how the grass and the flowers are shooting up after the rain! I wonder, are you interested in trees? It’s curious, but I feel a mysterious kinship with every tree in the forest. It is as though I once belonged to the forest; as I look around, a recollection seems to flash through my entire being. Ah, stop for a moment! Listen! Listen to the birds, how gaily they’re greeting the sun with their song! They are wildly delirious—they almost fly in our faces, not looking where they’re going.”
They walked on.
“I still catch myself thinking of that pretty picture you described to me of the boat and the blue silk sail in the shape of a half-moon,” she said. “It was so beautiful. When the sky is high and seems far away, I see myself rocking about up there, fishing with a silver hook.”
It made him happy to learn that she still remembered his Midsummer Eve reverie, his eyes grew moist and he replied warmly, “You’re right, it would really suit you better than me to sit in a boat like that.”
When they were about halfway into the forest, she was careless enough to ask, “How long will you be staying here?”
She regretted it immediately and would have liked to take it back, but was quickly reassured when he smiled and avoided a direct answer. She was grateful to him for his tact, he must have noticed her difficulty.
“I’ll be staying where you are, of course,” he replied.... “I’ll stay here until I run out of money,” he then said. And he added, “But it won’t be too long.”
She looked at him, also smiling, and asked, “It won’t be too long? But you’re rich, I’ve heard?”
His face assumed its old secretive expression as he answered, “Am I rich? Look, there seems to be a story going around town that I am a capitalist,