Nearing Home - Billy Graham [26]
Perhaps some may be saying, “Well, I’m sure those things are important, but I’m still young, and all this seems a long way off for me.” You are probably right; but your parents may be in turmoil about how their decisions affect not only them but you.
Some adult children worry that their parents are not taking these steps, and the children are reluctant to bring it up, thinking that the parents may mistake their motives. This does present a problem sometimes. The relationship between parents and their adult children can be difficult. As a rule adults don’t like to be told what to do by their parents—and parents don’t like to be told what to do by their children. But refusing to act on the practical issues that confront us as we grow older (or simply ignoring them) often becomes a sure recipe for turmoil and conflict within a family. I encourage adult children to consider turning the tables. Ask your parents’ advice as you seek what plans you should also put in place. Perhaps this would open up the discussion because, after all, they may also be reluctant to bring up dreaded subjects. Sometimes older people need their children’s perspective—and perhaps this approach can be the nudge that is needed.
Only you know the dynamics within your own family, but I encourage you not to draw back from trying to help in these important matters. Ask the Lord to give you wise words and a sense of right timing for such discussions. The Lord honors His people who do all in His name with respect, gentleness, and love. Take to heart the Bible’s admonition: “The wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere” (James 3:17).
A WORD TO PARENTS
My prayer is that you will be responsible for settling the business that must take place when living wills and last wills and final arrangements must be made. It is emotionally hard on others to make such decisions for a loved one. Be proactive so others won’t have to be reactive. The older generation should set an example of making important decisions while they are able to do so. Your children will someday be dealing with the same issues you are today. You can bless your children with the example of responsible planning.
I remember being moved when I read the last will and testament of the late J. P. Morgan. He is noted as perhaps the most influential banker in history. I have often wondered about the reaction of his children when they read their father’s will after his death in 1913. I hope they sensed the power of his words and gained strength from them: “I commit my soul into the hands of my Saviour, in full confidence that having redeemed it and washed it in His most precious blood He will present it faultless before the throne of my Heavenly Father; and I entreat my children to maintain and defend, at all hazard, and at any cost of personal sacrifice, the blessed doctrine of the complete atonement for sin through the blood of Jesus Christ, once offered, and through that alone.”1
Making choices for ourselves is not easy, but leaving them to someone else is risky. Having your house in order is one of the most important things parents can do for their children. Give them the peace of mind that you have your piece of mind and have taken care of the business that has come about from your lifetime of labor. More than anything else, let them know where you stand with the Lord Jesus Christ, for this will be your lasting legacy.
NEARING HOME WITH RESPONSIBLE PLANNING
Are we joyfully giving thanks in all circumstances, or are we making our last years on earth unbearable for ourselves and those close to us? Are we obediently setting things in place so that others will know that we were responsible followers