Nearing Home - Billy Graham [34]
A further peril may creep up on us as we grow older: intense loneliness, even feelings of abandonment. “No one cares what happens to me,” a woman in a nursing home said to me once. “My children live in different parts of the country and seldom come to see me. Often I cry myself to sleep, I feel so alone.” My heart went out to her, although I knew that others in her facility were facing similar situations.
Sometimes in their loneliness older people get drawn into making unwise decisions such as marrying someone they barely know or spending large sums of money on things they don’t need simply because a salesman acts friendly toward them. Many years ago an aunt of mine lived in Orlando, Florida. She had never married, but in the course of her life she had accumulated a fairly large amount of property. In her latter years, we discovered, a man with a gracious personality befriended her and wormed his way into her confidence. In time he convinced her to sell much of her property and allow him to invest her money for her. Shortly before she died, she discovered that most of the money had vanished. The man simply had taken advantage of her—and her loneliness.
One final peril is becoming so absorbed in our own problems and concerns that we can’t think about anyone else. “No one is more self-centered than a sick person,” a nurse told me once after dealing with a particularly difficult patient. I’m afraid she’s often right; sometimes I have to force my mind to turn away from whatever problem is absorbing me at the moment and make myself focus on the needs of others. Job had the same problem; in the midst of his pain and grief he apparently forgot the spiritual truths he’d once used to encourage others in their troubles. One of his friends gently rebuked him for this:
Think how you have instructed many,
how you have strengthened feeble hands.
Your words have supported those who stumbled;
you have strengthened faltering knees.
But now trouble comes to you, and you are discouraged. . . .
Should not your piety [your devotion to God] be your confidence? (Job 4:3–6)
WHEN CHRIST IS THE FOCUS
How do we overcome the perils that steal our zest for life? Let the promises of God’s Word, the Bible, uphold you every day. Turn constantly to Him in prayer, confident not only that He hears you but that even now Jesus is interceding for you. Focus your thoughts on Christ, and maintain your connection with other believers who can encourage and help you. The Bible’s words are true: “Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future . . . nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38–39).
In the weeks before her death, my wife, Ruth, repeated these verses over and over to us. Ruth was always thinking of others. This was her secret for getting through so much of life with joy. She never focused on her problems, she turned her attention to Christ, and He always led her to someone who needed a word of encouragement or a listening ear.
My sister Catherine was in a nursing home several years before her death. She had restricted mobility, and her health was fragile. But she knew all the residents and patiently listened to their concerns. She showed them the compassion of Christ and had many opportunities to witness. The Lord used her even in her own hours of weakness.
I have been told about an eighty-six-year-old lady who is dealing with debilitating illnesses, yet she goes from church on Sundays to the local nursing home to visit the elderly, read Scripture to them, and pray for them. She looks forward to this each week. She’s focused on others.
A ninety-six-year-old grandmother has “lots of time at home alone,” she says. “I just sit