Nearing Home - Billy Graham [42]
7
INFLUENCING THE IMPRESSIONABLE
I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother . . . and in your mother . . . and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.
—2 TIMOTHY 1:5
Wise counsel to the younger is the duty of the aged.
—UNKNOWN
A new generation of caregivers takes control of kids,” read a Washington Post headline in 2010. The article, based on a 2007 Pew Research Center study, reported that one in ten children in the United States now lives with a grandparent. In today’s world with all the controversy over Medicare, senior citizens, social security, and struggling to find caregivers for the aged, this is a breathtaking reversal in roles. Multiple reasons are cited for this remarkable statistic: parents losing their jobs and having to leave home to find work, parents on active military duty, parents incarcerated, orphaned children, court injunctions against drug-addicted parents, single parents battling life-threatening diseases, teen pregnancy, and the list goes on. A subhead in the article shouted, “Grandparents to the rescue!”
The stories are startling: One grandmother reported finding her two-month-old grandson on her doorstep when she responded to a knock at the door at 3:00 a.m. He had been left there by her drug-addicted daughter. A grandfather was asked if he resented his retirement being interrupted by having to raise his young grandchildren due to their parents’ deaths in an automobile accident. He said, “It is my duty. I certainly don’t want strangers raising my son’s children. Besides, what are grandparents for?” Some grandparents resent the intrusion; others see it as a blessing and are grateful for the opportunity to provide stability in the midst of emotional trauma difficult for any youth to cope with. For some grandparents, there is a tremendous financial hardship that accompanies their new role. Many live on meager incomes and cannot return to work for a myriad of reasons.1
One hundred years ago, similar conditions would not have presented the same challenges. Multigenerational homes were common, particularly in farm communities that were the backbone of our nation. Society did not look down on homesteads where the grandparents lived with a married child and spouse and their several children. They all sat around the dinner table daily having collectively worked the farm, maintained household chores, and prepared the meals. Everyone pitched in. Then they would all retreat to the front porch in the cool of the evening or gather around the fireplace to keep warm in the winter. They would laugh, share stories, and plan to do it all again the next day. Children saw their parents respecting their grandparents, an example that taught honor toward the elderly. The grandparents were grateful both for the hustle and bustle of youth and for the opportunity to support and guide their adult children in parenting. Many from the older generation often said that it increased their vitality and zest for life. While not every family situation was that picturesque, multigenerational homes weren’t a bad concept. Strong family ties grew strong, reliable character, and I believe young people who know nothing of that era have missed out on important lessons.
My point is that grandparents and great-grandparents today often dismiss the importance of their family role. Respect must be earned and given. While society has belittled the impact of the older generations, the elderly have too easily relinquished their roles without much thought. The Bible tells us to care for our family members, especially our immediate families (1 Timothy 5:8). The example must start with those who have lived the longest. Some may say that the elderly are no longer relevant in society,