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For example, if you're the paying parent, you might argue that because you are paying for your kids' private school and all of their uninsured medical expenses, the support payment should be less than the guideline amount. (But even if you're providing some extras, the base amount of support has to be enough for the necessities.) Or if you have custody of a disabled child who requires extra care and has unusual medical expenses, you might think the support paid to you should be higher than the guideline amount.

In any case, be prepared to show the judge documentation of your position. A budget showing all of your expenses relating to the kids will impress the judge with your attention to their needs and the seriousness of your position.

Here are some circumstances that might cause a judge to set support above or below the guideline amount:

• The noncustodial parent can afford more. If the paying parent earns a great deal of money, has other significant assets, or receives inkind compensation like employer-provided housing or vehicle, the judge may order a payment that's more than the guideline amount.

• The guideline amount is more than what's needed. If the noncustodial parent makes so much money that the guideline support amount would be much more than is needed to pay for the children's regular expenses, the judge might reduce the amount somewhat. But both parents will always be required to contribute to supporting the kids.

• The paying parent can't pay. If the noncustodial parent earns very little money, has other expenses that make it impossible to meet the guideline amount, or has recently lost a job, the court may order a lower support amount. The judge is also likely to order the parents to return to court at a set time so that the judge can review their current circumstances.

• A child has special needs or interests. A child with unusual medical, psychological, or educational needs may require a higher amount of support. Also, if your child is an avid musician or involved in sports or other activities, you can ask the judge to order the paying parent to pay an additional amount so that the child can continue a favorite activity.

• The paying parent is shirking. A parent's earnings sometimes don't reflect true earning potential-for example, say a parent is trained as a lawyer but works as a bookstore clerk. In that case, a court might calculate support based on what the parent could be earning (that's called imputing income).

Estimating Child Support in Your Family

There are a lot of resources that can help you estimate what you might expect to pay in child support. The Internet is your best friend for this, so if you aren't connected at home, find a cafe or public library where you can get online and do some research. There are three ways you can get a general idea of how much support is likely to be ordered in your case:

• Ask your lawyer, who undoubtedly has software that will calculate support for your state. This will give you the most accurate idea of what support is likely to be.

• Use an online calculator (or downloadable worksheets) specifically designed for your state by either the court system, the child support enforcement agency for your state, or a commercial website. This will give you a decent estimate of support. The best websites for finding a child support calculator for each state are listed below.

• If your state doesn't have any resources to help you, use the online calculators at www.alllaw.com (click "Family Law" under "Topics." Then use the calculator link and find your state). This will give you a ballpark figure, but is not nearly as reliable as either of the other methods. (Many other websites that say they offer child support calculators actually redirect you to alllaw.com.)

When you use an online calculator, remember that the result won't be the exact amount of support that a judge might order. For one thing, you may not know your spouse's exact income or deductions, or how much the kids' health insurance