On Fire's Wings - Christie Golden [70]
“Of course not. I shouldn’t have said that.” A soft moan escaped his lips and he buried his face in his hands. “If only you knew who it was,” he said, his voice thick with pain.
“Maybe we can find out. I have an idea….”
Chapter Fourteen
Tahmu lazed in the cool water, letting it caress his body and wash away the dirt and aches of a hard day of riding. Sa’abahs were more comfortable than horses, but he had been riding since daybreak and it was nearly dusk. He was growing older and his body preferred beds to hard-packed desert soil.
He heard footsteps coming down the stairs and turned to see who it was. He smiled when he saw Jashemi.
“Have you come to join me in the waters, my son?”
“Indeed I have, Father, unless you wish to be alone.”
“I always have time for you.” The words were sincere. There had been a distance between them since Jashemi had spoken to Tahmu of his dreams. Jashemi had said nothing more about them since then and Tahmu desperately hoped the troubling dreams had ceased.
Jashemi stripped off his rhia and stepped into the cool water. He sank beneath the surface, then sat beside his father on the stone steps. The silence that fell between them was awkward, but Tahmu waited for Jashemi to break it.
“My birth festival is approaching,” Jashemi said at last. Tahmu nodded. Jashemi would be turning twenty, the age at which an Arukani youth became a man. The Waiting would then begin, and within six months the Acknowledgment would occur. At that time, Jashemi would come into his own as heir. He would not receive all of his father’s land, wealth or prestige, but much of it would be granted to him at that time.
“I have a request,” Jashemi continued. “I would like to make the ceremony open to all members of the Clan and their servants. Even five-scores.”
“We will be gathering everyone together for the Acknowledgment in six more months. They will not like having to make the trek twice.”
“I know,” his son said. “But I would like to do this.”
“Why?”
“Perhaps we can change things around,” Jashemi said, which was not an answer to the question. “Perhaps we can have everyone come for the birthday celebration instead.”
Tahmu regarded his offspring with a mixture of affection and exasperation. Where had this streak of defiance come from? Why was Jashemi so bent on changing things, on defying—
And then he thought of a youth much like Jashemi, who had been hotheaded and passionate and set on much greater acts of defiance. Jashemi-kha-Tahmu had had bad dreams a few years ago, and now he wanted to change the order in which the Clan came to honor him. Tahmu-kha-Rakyn had wanted to marry a low-caste woman and had brought their Bai-sha child into the House of Four Waters. Who was he to judge his son?
Sighing, he said, “It can be done, but we will need to send falcons out tomorrow. Such a journey requires time to prepare, and we must make it as simple as possible for our people to obey. You are certain you must have it this way?”
Jashemi turned to face him. He smiled, but there was something sad in his eyes. “I have never been more certain of anything in my life,” he said.
As he regarded his son and thought about the upcoming celebration, Tahmu realized that there were things he and Jashemi had never discussed; things that a father needed to tell his son.
“You are about to become a man according to the laws of our people,” he said. “Soon after that, you will take a wife.”
Jashemi’s expression was unreadable. “I am not unaware of my duties to the Clan.”
“It is not always a duty,” Tahmu said. “With the right woman, it can be joyful.”
“Forgive me for saying this, Father, but it seems to me from what you have told me that you know of both joy and duty, but not with the same woman.”
Tahmu could not deny the truth of the statement. Instead he replied, “Let us hope that your mother finds you a wife with whom you can share both. Have you…lain with a woman?”
“No.” The answer was short and harsh. Tahmu