One Day in May - Catherine Alliott [164]
‘But how the hell did it happen?’ I hissed, glancing down the hall. ‘I mean, how on earth did you two ever get it together?’
‘We had a fight one day – one of many, I might add – at Laura’s. It was when you’d gone back to London. We were arguing about that vase of his in the hall, with the cherubs on, remember? He kept putting it there, on a table, and I kept taking it away because I felt it interfered with the karma of the kitchen?’
I did. Some silly squabble about how three paces from the kitchen was still her territory, and when she flung open the door, all she could see was his hideous vase, intruding.
‘So I picked it up and marched off with it, planning to plonk it in the dining room, his space. He blocked my way down the corridor, telling me to put it back, now. I refused. Told him to bugger off. We stood there facing each other, hissing and spitting like two cats, getting closer and closer until we were nose to nose. There we were, eyeball to eyeball, still trading insults, when suddenly, he put his arms around me and kissed me really hard on the mouth, like something out of a Cary Grant film. No – Gone with the Wind, at the end. Clark Gable.’
‘Good God.’
‘I nearly dropped the bloody vase, which, as you know, is worth a fortune, and of course I couldn’t hit him or anything, didn’t have a free hand. I couldn’t even wriggle, he’s so strong. And then, after a moment, I realized I was enjoying it. Really enjoying it. So I sort of… succumbed.’
‘Like Scarlett!’
‘I suppose.’ She looked abashed. ‘And of course I was paralysed with shock too, because I’d always always thought he was gay.’
‘Well, quite!’ I agreed.
‘But he’s not. He’s just really artistic and creative. But people don’t understand a man who rearranges bedcovers for a living, so he affects this dandy camp bit, which becomes something of a habit when he’s working. Look at that chap on the telly—’
‘Laurence Llewelyn…?’
‘Thingy, exactly, and he’s as straight as they come. And, of course, it goes down brilliantly with all his female customers, who love the idea of a gay best friend. Goes down well with their husbands too, incidentally, who don’t necessarily want some gorgeous hunk in the master bedroom discussing king size or super king. I mean, it’s the tennis coach with knobs on, isn’t it, if you’ll excuse the expression. And imagine how many frustrated housewives would be wrestling Ralph into their boudoirs if they knew he was up for it?’
‘There is that,’ I said with feeling. Ralph was distinctly gorgeous, and some of the women of Kensington and Chelsea were panting as they opened the door to the milkman. He’d be dragged in by his velvet lapels. She’d quite stolen a march.
‘Good for you, Maggs,’ I said admiringly.
‘Isn’t it?’ she agreed coquettishly, rearranging her dressing gown again. She blinked in astonishment. ‘And I thought I’d got to the age when getting lucky meant finding your car keys.’
I giggled.
‘And it’s not just that,’ she went on with a little frown. ‘He really wants to be with me, you know? I mean, not just in bed.’ She peered at me. ‘Is that normal?’
‘Well, if someone likes you, of course it is.’
‘See? I forget. It’s been so long. Can’t think what I’ve been doing all these years.’ She looked dazed. ‘I tell him I’m going out to get some milk, and he jumps up and says I’ll come with you. Or I potter to the shop for an hour, and he comes too. He really likes the shop, incidentally. But with Henry, all I could think about was how long he’d stay at the flat afterwards, which wasn’t long.’
‘But that’s so lovely, Maggs,’ I said, delighted.
‘Isn’t it?’ she blushed. ‘He’s practically moved in.’
‘Has he?’ I gaped. ‘Already?’
‘Yes!’ She glanced round in case he overheard. Lowered her voice. ‘He’s got this incredibly cool pad in Docklands, but seems to want to spend all his time in my poky little house.’
‘Tea’s ready!’ A voice boomed – yes, boomed – from the kitchen.
‘And he’s got so many brilliant ideas for our business,’ she confided breathlessly. ‘In fact, he thinks we ought to go into business together, just him and me.