Pale Fire - Vladimir Nabokov [93]
Shade [smiling and massaging my knee]: “Kings do not die—they only disappear, eh, Charles?”
“Who said that?” asked sharply, as if coming out of a trance, the ignorant, and always suspicious, Head of the English Department.
“Take my own case,” continued my dear friend ignoring Mr. H. “I have been said to resemble at least four people: Samuel Johnson; the lovingly reconstructed ancestor of man in the Exton Museum; and two local characters, one being the slapdash disheveled hag who ladles out the mash in the Levin Hall cafeteria.”
“The third in the witch row,” I precised quaintly, and everybody laughed.
“I would rather say,” remarked Mr. Pardon—American History—“that she looks like Judge Goldsworth” (“One of us,” interposed Shade inclining his head), “especially when he is real mad at the whole world after a good dinner.”
“I hear,” hastily began Netochka, “that the Goldsworths are having a wonderful time—”
“What a pity I cannot prove my point,” muttered the tenacious German visitor. “If only there was a picture here. Couldn’t there be somewhere—”
“Sure,” said young Emerald and left his seat.
Professor Pardon now spoke to me: “I was under the impression that you were born in Russia, and that your name was a kind of anagram of Botkin or Botkine?”
Kinbote: “You are confusing me with some refugee from Nova Zembla” [sarcastically stressing the “Nova”].
“Didn’t you tell me, Charles, that kinbote means regicide in your language?” asked my dear Shade.
“Yes, a king’s destroyer,” I said (longing to explain that a king who sinks his identity in the mirror of exile is in a sense just that).
Shade [addressing the German visitor]: “Professor Kinbote is the author of a remarkable book on surnames. I believe [to me] there exists an English translation?”
“Oxford, 1956,” I replied.
“You do know Russian, though?” said Pardon. “I think I heard you, the other day, talking to—what’s his name—oh, my goodness” [laboriously composing his lips].
Shade: “Sir, we all find it difficult to attack that name” [laughing].
Professor Hurley: “Think of the French word for ‘tire’: punoo.”
Shade: “Why, sir, I am afraid you have only punctured the difficulty” [laughing uproariously].
“Flatman,” quipped I. “Yes,” I went on, turning to Pardon, “I certainly do speak Russian. You see, it was the fashionable language par excellence, much more so than French, among the nobles of Zembla at least, and at its court. Today, of course, all this has changed. It is now the lower classes who are forcibly taught to speak Russian.”
“Aren’t we, too, trying to teach Russian in our schools?” said Pink.
In the meantime, at the other end of the room, young Emerald had been communing with the bookshelves. At this point he returned with the T-Z volume of an illustrated encyclopedia.
“Well,” said he, “here he is, that king. But look, he is young and handsome” (“Oh, that won’t do,” wailed the German visitor.) “Young, handsome, and wearing a fancy uniform,” continued Emerald. “Quite the fancy pansy, in fact.”
“And you,” I said quietly, “are a foul-minded pup in a cheap green jacket.”
“But what have I said?” the young instructor inquired of the company, spreading out his palms like a disciple in Leonardo’s Last Supper.
“Now, now,” said Shade. “I’m sure, Charles, our young friend never intended to insult your sovereign and name-sake.”
“He could not, even if he had wished,” I observed placidly, turning it all into a joke.
Gerald Emerald extended his hand—which at the moment of writing still remains in that position.
Lines 895-899: The more I weigh … or this dewlap
Instead of these facile and revolting lines, the draft gives:
895 I have a certain liking, I admit,
For Parody, that last resort of wit:
“In nature’s strife when fortitude prevails
The victim falters and the victor fails.”
899 Yes, reader, Pope
Line 920: little hairs stand on end
Alfred Housman (1859-1936), whose collection The Shropshire Lad vies with the In Memoriam of Alfred Tennyson (1809-1892) in representing, perhaps (no, delete