Party Girl_ A Novel - Anna David [78]
I nod, finding myself so caught up in the notion of this perfectly evolved and confident-sounding creature that I forget we’re even talking about me. I’m not sexually evolved, I think. The main word I associate with my own sexuality is “confusion.” In the column I’d just tried to have a sense of humor about what I’d done. But as Nadine talks, I find myself a bit won over. I liked the idea of being a sexually evolved woman. It makes me sound so much more together than I actually feel.
“But you’re not slutty,” Nadine continues, making a face. “You’re not Jenna Jameson—who, by the way, I represented and actually found to be quite sweet. You’re classy, with both a brain and self-knowledge. You’re the ideal modern-day woman.”
I nod. How could I do anything else?
“For the Today show, I want you to just be you. Always keeping in mind, of course, that you are representing Chat and all that Chat stands for. You’re witty but not silly, aware but still carefree, serious and yet spontaneous. In essence, you’re wild but you also know exactly what you’re doing. Make sense?”
I nod.
Nadine continues, “After this, I think our best plan of attack is to sit quiet?” She suddenly starts turning her voice up at the end of sentences so that they’re questions, and I get the sense she’s doing it so that I feel more included. “Let everyone see who you are, and make them want to find out more, but don’t let them have it yet? Until, of course, you have a few columns out, when we put you on The View? And oh my God you look a little overwhelmed? Am I overwhelming you?”
I hadn’t realized any anxiety I was feeling was actually apparent on my face but something about Nadine’s master plan is starting to make me feel dizzy.
“I’m fine,” I say, “just a little tired.”
“Oh, no!” Now it’s her turn to look alarmed. She looks like the kind of person who might typically gaze at me with some sort of disapproval, and I immediately know that my gray James Perse sundress isn’t appropriate. “We’ll need to stop by the Marc Jacobs showroom to pick up something a bit brighter. You look adorable, of course, but we need something a little more TV friendly? You won’t be able to check into the Royalton until after the Today show, but you can rest then, before we have dinner with Chat editors tonight at Schillers? And then it would be nice if we could put in an appearance at Butter afterward? Just so we could get something in one of the gossip columns tomorrow about how you came into town and managed to be everywhere all at once?”
I nod, suddenly feeling the effect of the double-shot espresso I had on the flight and realizing I’m excited. “Everything sounds great.” I smile. “Bring on the Marc Jacobs showroom.”
Nadine seems to exhale for the first time, and smiles back at me. “Are you sure you’re okay with going there? I know you might be feeling rushed so I could call ahead and let them know that you’re not going to wear Marc today unless we’re guaranteed that no one else is in the showroom?”
Remember in Pretty Woman when Richard Gere is giving Julia Roberts strawberries and champagne and she reminds him that she’s a sure thing and he doesn’t need to woo her? I want to say some version of this to Nadine, to explain to her that everything that’s happening is already beyond my wildest dreams and she doesn’t need to worry. But I feel fairly certain that stress is so built into her DNA that whatever I say won’t calm her down.
“That’s sweet but I don’t think it will be necessary,” I say, as Nadine’s cell phone starts bleeping. She gives me a manic grin and a thumbs-up as she answers the phone.
As Nadine starts chatting into