Pathology of Lying [56]
have lived a lie from the day I was born until now.''
After these letters she went on making false statements which could readily be checked up. Nothing is any more curious in Gertrude's case than the anomaly of her telling several of us who tried to help her that up to the time of the given interview she had not thoroughly realized how bad it was to lie, and how she now felt keenly that she must cease, while perhaps at the end of the very same interview a reaction to a new situation would produce more fabrications. Personally I have seen nothing any more suggestive of the typical toper's good resolutions and sudden falling from grace.
The story of the forged check was fancifully embellished and ever more details were supplied at pleasure. While this matter was under investigation Gertrude stayed away from home several nights, two of which have never been accounted for. She told fairly plausible stories about going out of town, but she first should have studied time tables to make them wholly convincing. The mother, too, told that the girl had been out of town, but in this she was caught, for it was found that Gertrude had been part of the time with other relatives.
The main story of the check involved a man who worked in the same office. She stated that he made an immoral proposal to her on the basis of immunity from prosecution. After a couple of months Gertrude got round to confessing that she alone was responsible for the entire forgery and that her previous quite clever stories were not true. Her main confession was made in the form of a long letter written entirely aside from the influence of any one. In this she also stated that she had stolen money and jewelry, which was known to have been taken. There was no untrue self- accusation, except that she may have exaggerated her own tendency to falsify at a very early age. Naturally, in such a case as this, even the latest confession must always be taken cum grano salis.
Passing from the above probably sufficient account of Gertrude's falsifications as we knew them, we can take up her mental life and traits. We have had to rely on the girl herself, as we stated above, for many of these facts. She was brought up in poor circumstances in a manufacturing town in England where there had been many labor troubles. On two occasions when she was a child she had seen encounters on the street, and during one riot in their neighborhood her uncle was injured. She was considerably frightened, but, so far as we could learn, this was the only time in her life that she experienced any fear. Very early she found that stories told to frighten her were untrue, and what was said about the undesirability of certain children as playmates proved false when she came to know them. She early discovered that for self-satisfaction she would have to live a mental life of her own. There were many things which she could not discuss with her mother. In early childhood she was a great reader of novels and spent many hours lying on the bed living an imaginary life. She never discussed her ideas with any one. Later she took to more serious reading, and of recent years she has assailed many of the world's greatest problems. Particularly she tells of the influence of Tolstoi's ``Kreutzer Sonata'' upon her. During two years she has read it four times and it has convinced her of the shams of character and that people lead dual lives.
When she was about 9 or 10 years old she began talking with other girls about sex problems and up to the present time has never consulted any grown person about them. Her first information of this kind was obtained from a crowd of girls who used successfully to lie to their teachers and mothers to get out of school work. Going further into the question of this hidden knowledge of sex things, she tells us she has never worried much about the things she has heard, but she has wondered a great deal and they have often come up in her mind. She pursued the course of asking many girls what they knew about this subject and then, getting unsatisfactory
After these letters she went on making false statements which could readily be checked up. Nothing is any more curious in Gertrude's case than the anomaly of her telling several of us who tried to help her that up to the time of the given interview she had not thoroughly realized how bad it was to lie, and how she now felt keenly that she must cease, while perhaps at the end of the very same interview a reaction to a new situation would produce more fabrications. Personally I have seen nothing any more suggestive of the typical toper's good resolutions and sudden falling from grace.
The story of the forged check was fancifully embellished and ever more details were supplied at pleasure. While this matter was under investigation Gertrude stayed away from home several nights, two of which have never been accounted for. She told fairly plausible stories about going out of town, but she first should have studied time tables to make them wholly convincing. The mother, too, told that the girl had been out of town, but in this she was caught, for it was found that Gertrude had been part of the time with other relatives.
The main story of the check involved a man who worked in the same office. She stated that he made an immoral proposal to her on the basis of immunity from prosecution. After a couple of months Gertrude got round to confessing that she alone was responsible for the entire forgery and that her previous quite clever stories were not true. Her main confession was made in the form of a long letter written entirely aside from the influence of any one. In this she also stated that she had stolen money and jewelry, which was known to have been taken. There was no untrue self- accusation, except that she may have exaggerated her own tendency to falsify at a very early age. Naturally, in such a case as this, even the latest confession must always be taken cum grano salis.
Passing from the above probably sufficient account of Gertrude's falsifications as we knew them, we can take up her mental life and traits. We have had to rely on the girl herself, as we stated above, for many of these facts. She was brought up in poor circumstances in a manufacturing town in England where there had been many labor troubles. On two occasions when she was a child she had seen encounters on the street, and during one riot in their neighborhood her uncle was injured. She was considerably frightened, but, so far as we could learn, this was the only time in her life that she experienced any fear. Very early she found that stories told to frighten her were untrue, and what was said about the undesirability of certain children as playmates proved false when she came to know them. She early discovered that for self-satisfaction she would have to live a mental life of her own. There were many things which she could not discuss with her mother. In early childhood she was a great reader of novels and spent many hours lying on the bed living an imaginary life. She never discussed her ideas with any one. Later she took to more serious reading, and of recent years she has assailed many of the world's greatest problems. Particularly she tells of the influence of Tolstoi's ``Kreutzer Sonata'' upon her. During two years she has read it four times and it has convinced her of the shams of character and that people lead dual lives.
When she was about 9 or 10 years old she began talking with other girls about sex problems and up to the present time has never consulted any grown person about them. Her first information of this kind was obtained from a crowd of girls who used successfully to lie to their teachers and mothers to get out of school work. Going further into the question of this hidden knowledge of sex things, she tells us she has never worried much about the things she has heard, but she has wondered a great deal and they have often come up in her mind. She pursued the course of asking many girls what they knew about this subject and then, getting unsatisfactory