Perfect Fifths_ A Jessica Darling Novel - Megan McCafferty [50]
“You’ve always been so honest with her.”
“I’m honest because I’m not a very good liar.” [Cough.]
“I know that.”
[Pause.]
“Are Bethany and G-Money involved in new relationships?”
“Uh, yeah. Why do you ask?”
“I imagine it would be easier to make the transition to friendship if you’ve already moved on to someone else.”
“I imagine it would.”
[Pause.]
“It’s kind of funny, actually.”
“What?”
“Well… Bethany got back together with a high school boyfriend.”
“I-ROC Jerry? The one who only listened to Def Leppard?”
“Oh my God. I told you about I-ROC Jerry?”
“In the notebook. Either that or I’m coopting another one of your memories as my own.”
“He’s E-Car Jerry now, the most successful distributor of eco-friendly personal transport on the East Coast.”
“No shit.”
“Yes shit. In fact, I think he sold Leonardo DiCaprio a private jet that runs entirely on human waste.”
“Ha.”
“Thank you. So anyway, my sister was newly divorced, hadn’t gone on a date since 1994, and started trawling the Internets for ex-lovers. One e-mail led to another e-mail, which led to a face-to-face reunion over coffee and …”
“The rest is romantic history.”
“Uh, right.”
[Extended pause.]
“I’ll be happy to provide Marin with a status update.”
“You can tell her I’m doing just great and that I think about her, too.”
“You do?”
“Of course I do.”
“Really?”
“Yes, Jessica; I think about it all.”
four
(happy enough)
“So … How are your parents, Marcus? Your dad?”
“Thanks for asking. That’s … nice.”
“I wasn’t asking to be nice. I don’t do things just to be nice.”
“Right. Because Jessica Darling would never live up to her last name by doing anything just for the sake of being—bleurg!—nice.”
“I asked because I want to know.”
“I was joking, Jessica. My dad is fine. Although he seems to think that surviving prostate cancer gives him a license to ride his motorcycle like a reckless maniac. But what can I do? I’m just his son, right? I can tell him that he’s a danger to himself and everyone else on the road, but he doesn’t have to listen to me.”
“Yikes.”
“Yikes is right. But overall, my parents are happy, I guess. At least that’s what they tell me on the phone. I don’t see much of them since they moved.”
“My mom told me when their house was up for sale. She actually asked me whether it would be appropriate for her to offer her services as an accredited home-staging professional.”
“Oh, man. At least she asked.”
“‘At a discount, Jessica! I or one of my associates would provide the Fluties the full Darling’s Designs for Leaving experience at a fraction of the price.’”
“You sound exactly like your mother when you do that. I mean, I haven’t heard her speak in years, but wow. Your impression. It’s eerie.”
“I’ve had years of practice.”
“I’m sure your mother meant well.”
“I know she meant well. My mother always means well; she never intentionally tries to mortify me. In this case, I think she saw it as a way to help out your parents, to do them a favor to make up for …”
“For what?”
“For any [cough] stress our relationship might have caused you, and them [sniffle] by extension.”
“Hmmmm.”
“But they obviously sold the house without the benefit of the full Darling’s Designs for Leaving experience, as my mother put it. Where are they now?”
“They spend summers at my brother’s campground in Maine, swimming, fishing, spoiling their grandchildren. They spend winters in a stucco bungalow located in an over-fifty-five community in Key West. I can’t believe I have parents old enough to retire to Florida. What are yours up to?”
“My parents? After thirty-whatever years together, they’ve discovered the key to marital bliss.”
“What’s that?”
“Never spending enough time together to get on each other’s nerves.”
“Come on, Jessica.”
“I’m not being judgmental here.”
“It sounds like you are.”
“I’m not. I’m not