Plutus [9]
fattened on the public funds, they conceive a hatred for
justice, plan intrigues against the people and attack the democracy.
CHREMYLUS
That is absolutely true, although your tongue is very vile. But it
matters not, so don't put on those triumphant airs; you shall not be
punished any the less for having tried to persuade me that poverty
is worth more than wealth.
POVERTY
Not being able to refute my arguments, you chatter at random and
exert yourself to no purpose.
CHREMYLUS
Then tell me this, why does all mankind flee from you?
POVERTY
Because I make them better. Children do the very same; they flee
from the wise counsels of their fathers. So difficult is it to see
one's true interest.
CHREMYLUS
Will you say that Zeus cannot discern what is best? Well, he takes
Plutus to himself...
BLEPSIDEMUS
...and banishes Poverty to the earth.
POVERTY
Ah me! how purblind you are, you old fellows of the days of
Cronus! Why, Zeus is poor, and I will clearly prove it to you. In
the Olympic games, which he founded, and to which he convokes the
whole of Greece every four years, why does he only crown the
victorious athletes with wild olive? If he were rich he would give
them gold.
CHREMYLUS
That's the way he shows that he clings to his wealth; he is
sparing with it, won't part with any portion of it, only bestows
baubles on the victors and keeps his money for himself.
POVERTY
But wealth coupled to such sordid greed is yet more shameful
than poverty.
CHREMYLUS
May Zeus destroy you, both you and your chaplet of wild olive!
POVERTY
Thus you dare to maintain that Poverty is not the fount of all
blessings!
CHREMYLUS
Ask Hecate whether it is better to be rich or starving; she will
tell you that the rich send her a meal every month and that the poor
make it disappear before it is even served. But go and hang yourself
and don't breathe another syllable. I will not be convinced against my
will.
POVERTY
"Oh! citizens of Argos! do you hear what he says?"
CHREMYLUS
Invoke Pauson, your boon companion, rather.
POVERTY
Alas! what is to become of me?
CHREMYLUS
Get you gone, be off quick and a pleasant journey to you.
POVERTY
But where shall I go?
CHREMYLUS
To gaol; but hurry up, let us put an end to this.
POVERTY (as she departs)
One day you will recall me.
CHREMYLUS
Then you can return; but disappear for the present. I prefer to be
rich; you are free to knock your head against the walls in your rage.
BLEPSIDEMUS
And I too welcome wealth. I want, when I leave the bath all
perfumed with essences, to feast bravely with my wife and children and
to fart in the faces of toilers and Poverty.
CHREMYLUS
So that hussy has gone at last! But let us make haste to put
Plutus to bed in the Temple of Asclepius.
BLEPSIDEMUS
Let us make haste; else some bothering fellow may again come to
interrupt us.
CREMYLUS (loudly)
Cario, bring the coverlets and all that I have got ready from
the house; let us conduct the god to the temple, taking care to
observe all the proper rites.
(CARIO comes out of the house with a
bundle under one arm and leading PLUTUS with the other.
CHREMYLUS and BLEPSIDEMUS join him and all four of them depart.)
(Interlude of dancing by the CHORUS.)
CARIO
Oh! you old fellows, who used to dip out the broth served to the
poor at the festival of Theseus with little pieces of bread hollowed
like a spoon, how worthy of envy is your fate! How happy you are, both
you and all just men!
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
My good fellow, what has happened to your friends? You seem the
bearer of good tidings.
CARIO
What joy-for my master and even more for Plutus! The god has
regained
justice, plan intrigues against the people and attack the democracy.
CHREMYLUS
That is absolutely true, although your tongue is very vile. But it
matters not, so don't put on those triumphant airs; you shall not be
punished any the less for having tried to persuade me that poverty
is worth more than wealth.
POVERTY
Not being able to refute my arguments, you chatter at random and
exert yourself to no purpose.
CHREMYLUS
Then tell me this, why does all mankind flee from you?
POVERTY
Because I make them better. Children do the very same; they flee
from the wise counsels of their fathers. So difficult is it to see
one's true interest.
CHREMYLUS
Will you say that Zeus cannot discern what is best? Well, he takes
Plutus to himself...
BLEPSIDEMUS
...and banishes Poverty to the earth.
POVERTY
Ah me! how purblind you are, you old fellows of the days of
Cronus! Why, Zeus is poor, and I will clearly prove it to you. In
the Olympic games, which he founded, and to which he convokes the
whole of Greece every four years, why does he only crown the
victorious athletes with wild olive? If he were rich he would give
them gold.
CHREMYLUS
That's the way he shows that he clings to his wealth; he is
sparing with it, won't part with any portion of it, only bestows
baubles on the victors and keeps his money for himself.
POVERTY
But wealth coupled to such sordid greed is yet more shameful
than poverty.
CHREMYLUS
May Zeus destroy you, both you and your chaplet of wild olive!
POVERTY
Thus you dare to maintain that Poverty is not the fount of all
blessings!
CHREMYLUS
Ask Hecate whether it is better to be rich or starving; she will
tell you that the rich send her a meal every month and that the poor
make it disappear before it is even served. But go and hang yourself
and don't breathe another syllable. I will not be convinced against my
will.
POVERTY
"Oh! citizens of Argos! do you hear what he says?"
CHREMYLUS
Invoke Pauson, your boon companion, rather.
POVERTY
Alas! what is to become of me?
CHREMYLUS
Get you gone, be off quick and a pleasant journey to you.
POVERTY
But where shall I go?
CHREMYLUS
To gaol; but hurry up, let us put an end to this.
POVERTY (as she departs)
One day you will recall me.
CHREMYLUS
Then you can return; but disappear for the present. I prefer to be
rich; you are free to knock your head against the walls in your rage.
BLEPSIDEMUS
And I too welcome wealth. I want, when I leave the bath all
perfumed with essences, to feast bravely with my wife and children and
to fart in the faces of toilers and Poverty.
CHREMYLUS
So that hussy has gone at last! But let us make haste to put
Plutus to bed in the Temple of Asclepius.
BLEPSIDEMUS
Let us make haste; else some bothering fellow may again come to
interrupt us.
CREMYLUS (loudly)
Cario, bring the coverlets and all that I have got ready from
the house; let us conduct the god to the temple, taking care to
observe all the proper rites.
(CARIO comes out of the house with a
bundle under one arm and leading PLUTUS with the other.
CHREMYLUS and BLEPSIDEMUS join him and all four of them depart.)
(Interlude of dancing by the CHORUS.)
CARIO
Oh! you old fellows, who used to dip out the broth served to the
poor at the festival of Theseus with little pieces of bread hollowed
like a spoon, how worthy of envy is your fate! How happy you are, both
you and all just men!
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
My good fellow, what has happened to your friends? You seem the
bearer of good tidings.
CARIO
What joy-for my master and even more for Plutus! The god has
regained