Prime Time - Jane Fonda [151]
Dr. Tom Lue, internationally recognized expert in the treatment of male sexual dysfunction at the University of California, San Francisco, explained to me, with great humor, the ins and outs of male sexual dysfunction, in particular the penile implant.
Dr. Louann Brizendine taught me a lot about the female brain and sexuality in aging women. Dr. Brizendine is a neuropsychiatrist at the University of California, San Francisco, founder and director of the Women’s Mood and Hormone Clinic, and co-director of the Program in Sexual Medicine at UCSF.
Dr. Barbara Bartlik, sex therapist and psychiatrist, helped me, in her juicy, forthright manner, with ideas for heightening sexuality as we age.
Dr. Laura Carstensen, founding director of the Stanford Center on Longevity, gave generously of her time and expertise in many areas of aging. She took me around the Center and introduced me to many of their researchers, including Dr. Thomas Rando, Stanford Center on Longevity’s deputy director and stem-cell biologist. It was Dr. Rando who helped me understand the role of stem-cell research and aging.
Dr. Ken Matheny, regents professor at the Department of Counseling and Psychological Services at Georgia State University, profoundly helped me to understand much about late life and the spirit.
Thanks to Mary Madden, who generously shared her experience with online dating.
Deep thanks to the staff and clients at the center for WISE & Healthy Aging in Santa Monica, California, who gave me so much of their time and shared their moving experiences.
I am eternally grateful to Beverly Kitaen-Morse, who taught me, with her therapy, the value of a life review.
And to all the friends whose stories enrich this book, I am filled with love and gratitude. Thank you for your trust: Erica Jong, Roshi Joan Halifax, Janet Wolfe, Nat and Jewelle Bickford, Mary Catherine Bateson, Dr. Johnnetta Cole, the Honorable Robin Biddle Duke, Yoel and Eva Haller, Reverend Bill and Kathy Stayton, and those others who shared their most personal intimacies and asked that their real names not be used.
Notes
PREFACE: The Arch and the Staircase
1 Mary Catherine Bateson, Composing a Life (New York: Plume, 1990), p. 34.
2 Mary Catherine Bateson, Composing a Further Life (New York: Knopf, 2010), p. 12.
3 Bernice Neugarten, “Dynamics of Transition of Middle Age to Old Age,” Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry, vol. 4, no. 1 (Fall 1970), pp. 71–87.
4 Erik H. Erikson and Joan M. Erikson, The Life Cycle Completed: Extended Version with New Chapters on the Ninth Stage of Development (New York: W. W. Norton & Company, 1997), p. 114.
5 George Vaillant, Aging Well (New York: Little, Brown, 2002), p. 113.
CHAPTER 1: Act III: Becoming Whole
1 Carl Jung, Modern Man in Search of a Soul.
2 Rudolf Arnheim, New Essays on the Psychology of Art (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1986).
3 Marion Perlmutter, interview with the author, Ann Arbor, Michigan.
4 Peter Applebome, “Loss of Speech Evokes the Voice of a Writer,” The New York Times, March 7, 2011, p. A14.
5 Stephen Levine, A Year to Live (New York: Three Rivers, 1997), p. 38.
CHAPTER 2: A Life Review: Looking Back to See the Road Ahead
1 From a letter to me from Kenneth Matheny, Regents Professor and director of the Department of Counseling and Psychological Services at Georgia State University.
CHAPTER 3: Act I: A Time for Gathering
1 Vaillant, Aging Well, p. 96.
2 Judith Newman, “Inside Your Teen’s Head,” Parade, November 28, 2010.
3 Laura Carstensen, A Long Bright Future: An Action Plan for a Lifetime of Happiness, Health, and Financial Security (New York: Broadway Books, 2009), p. 245.
4 Terrence Real, I Don’t Want to Talk About It, p. 146.
5 Vaillant, Aging Well, p. 285.
6 Terrence Real, The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Work (New York: Ballantine, 2007), p. 95.
7 Vaillant, Aging Well, p. 284.
8 Ibid., p. 285.
CHAPTER 4: Act II: A Time of Building and of In-Betweenness
1 Vaillant, Aging Well, p. 96.
2