Pug Hill - Alison Pace [44]
Kara looks past me, at Todd, and blinks. Kara’s a good blinker. I believe that there are actually really good blinkers in the world, and that Kara is one of them; she can convey a lot with her blinking and if I’m not mistaken, right now the blinking at Todd, it seems to be saying, What the fuck?
“She wanted rice,” Todd says, a little defensive.
Kara blinks again, the meaning this time unmistakable, and we wait as Chloe finds language again and goes back to screaming, “Maaaaaaan,” and Todd exhales.
“There is no rice Kara, and so I ordered Chinese food, and told her the man was going to bring her rice.”
“You know you can’t tell her that. You know she has a hard time with patience and with the concept of time,” Kara snaps, getting up from the banquette and crossing over to where Todd and Chloe are standing behind me. “Hi, Hope,” she says to me as she passes.
I say, “Hi,” but what I really want to say instead is, “Um, great then, here are some things for Chloe, and I’ll just be going,” because this is so unsettling. And it’s not that anything so bad is going on, except for Kara looking tired and snapping, and Todd looking something close to desperate, and Chloe not wearing any clothes. It’s just that I’m not used to Todd and Kara’s pre-war classic six, not right on Park Avenue but pretty close to it, with all the fabric, and the decorating, and the linens from Schweitzer Linens, being anything less than perfect.
And it’s not that I can’t handle a little less-than-perfect (believe me I’m pretty accustomed to the less-than-perfect) it’s just that Todd and Kara, this, right now, seems to go against the proper order of the universe. Ever since I realized that the pugs aren’t always at Pug Hill, I feel like that’s happening more and more often.
Kara reaches over to Todd who hands off Chloe. I’m still wondering what all of this has to do with Chloe only wearing her diaper, but decide it’s best not to ask, best to assume that not wanting to get dressed is just one of those things babies sometimes do.
Todd and I both watch silently as Kara sets Chloe down on the floor and squats down next to her, speaking slowly and softly. “Honey, the man isn’t here yet. The man might not get here for a while so you need to try and be patient.”
And, really, that’s it. Chloe takes this news startlingly well and puts her arms around Kara’s neck and sighs. It’s all so beautiful, and it all makes up for the screeching. The mysterious reason of why Chloe’s wearing only her diaper doesn’t seem to really matter at all anymore. Even though there’s still the tension, and even though I think Kara’s now rolling her eyes at Todd, who’s slipping into this office room they have, I feel very emotional over the fact that even when their apartment is really far from domestic bliss, it’s still pretty close. I’m about to tell Chloe that I have some birthday presents for her, but she looks at me first, quite solemnly for a two-year-old, and says, “The man may not be here for while.”
And I think, I know this, I really do. I nod back to her, and tell her, “I know.”
The buzzer goes off and Chloe yelps with delight.
“Thank God,” Kara says as she picks up the phone that connects to her doorman. “Please send him up, thanks.”
Chloe squeals, and claps her hands, and heads to the front door with Kara.
I go to the bathroom, the one in the hall with the red toile wallpaper, and cry.
chapter fifteen
We Should Really All Just Go Get a Drink
Before I know it, it’s Thursday, the end of Thursday; the little bit of light that comes through the basement windows is diminishing, the conservation room is getting darker, and it’s time again for Overcoming Presentation Anxiety class.
I very slowly and meticulously press my paintbrush in the Naphtha Solvent that we all use now instead of turpentine,