Pulp - Charles Bukowski [94]
The other woman was Jeannie Nitro.
I got the barkeep to make another scotch and water.
“Nicky,” she whispered, “I’ve got to talk to you. Who’s that bitch sitting with you?”
“You’d never guess,” I said.
Then Lady Death was whispering to me, “Who’s that bitch?”
“You’d never guess,” I said.
The drink came and Jeannie tossed it off.
“Well,” I said, “I guess it’s time for introductions…”
I turned to Lady Death.
“Lady, this is Jeannie Nitro…”
Then I turned to Jeannie.
“Jeannie, this is Lady…Lady…”
“Lady d’Heat,” Lady supplied.
They stared at each other.
Now this, I thought, could prove to be very interesting.
I waved the barkeep down for refills…
39
Here, basically, I was sitting between Space and Death. In the form of Woman. What chance did I have? Meanwhile, I was supposed to locate a Red Sparrow that maybe didn’t exist. I felt very odd about everything. I had never expected to get tangled up like this. I hardly understood the why of it. What could I do?
Play it cool, fool, came the answer.
O.k.
The drinks had arrived.
“Well, ladies, here’s to you!”
We clicked glasses and had a hit.
Why couldn’t I be just some guy sitting watching a baseball game? Involved in the outcome. Why couldn’t I be a fry cook scrambling eggs and acting detached? Why couldn’t I be a fly on some person’s wrist, crawling along sublimely involved? Why couldn’t I be a rooster in a chicken pen pecking at seed? Why this?
Jeannie nudged me with her elbow, whispered, “Belane, I’ve got to talk to you…”
I put some bills on the bar. Then I looked at Lady Death.
“I hope this doesn’t piss you but…”
“I know, fat boy, you’ve got to talk to the lady alone. Why should that piss me? I’m not in love with you.”
“But you always seem to be hanging around me, Lady.”
“I hang around everybody, Nick, you are just more aware of me.”
“Yeah. Yeah.”
“Well, you helped me with Celine…”
“Yes, Celine…”
“So, I’ll leave you alone for a while with your lady. But only for a while. You and I have some unfinished business, so I’ll be seeing you.”
“Lady d’Heat, I have no doubt of that…”
She finished her drink and rose from her stool. She turned and walked toward the door. Her beauty was foreboding. Then she was gone.
The barkeep came down for his money.
“Who was that?” he asked. “I got kind of dizzy when she walked by.”
“Be glad you only felt dizzy,” I told him.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“If I told you, you wouldn’t believe it,” I said.
“Try me,” he said.
“I don’t have to. Now look, give me a little space here, I want to talk to this lady.”
“All right. But just tell me one thing.”
“O.k.”
“How come a fat ugly guy like you gets all the action?”
“It’s because of the buttermilk I put on my waffles. Now, get the hell out of here.”
“Don’t get fresh, buddy,” he said.
“You asked.”
“But you didn’t have to get nasty!”
“If you think that was nasty, just keep hanging around.”
“Fuck you,” he said.
“That was brilliant,” I said. “Now move off while you can.”
He slowly moved down to the end of the bar, stood there a moment, then scratched his ass.
I turned back to Jeannie.
“Sorry, baby, but I seem to get into these negative dialogues with almost every bartender I meet.”
“It’s all right, Belane.”
She looked sad.
“Belane, I’m going to have to leave.”
“Oh, that’s o.k., but have one for the road.”
“No, I mean I’m going to have to leave, the people I have with me are going to have to leave…the earth. I don’t know why, but I got kind of fond of you.”
“That’s understandable,” I laughed, “but why is your gang leaving the earth?”
“We’ve thought it over, it’s just too awful. We don’t want to colonize your earth.”
“What’s too awful, Jeannie?”
“The earth. Smog, murder, the poisoned air, the poisoned water, the poisoned food, the hatred, the hopelessness, everything. The only beautiful thing about the earth is the animals and now they are being killed off, soon they will be gone except for pet rats and race horses. It’s so sad, no wonder you drink so much.”
“Yeah, Jeannie. And don’t forget our atomic stockpiles.”
“Yes, you’ve dug