Quinn - Iris Johansen [18]
“I’ll think about it.”
“I’m putting you on the spot again, aren’t I?” She added wearily, “I don’t want to do that, Joe. I like you. Maybe I should go check out the newspapers.”
“Screw that. I’m not worried about being put on the spot. I’ll do what I want to do.” He said roughly, “I’ve gotten to know you. You’re going to get attached to those kids in the reports. You’re going to identify with the parents. It’s going to hurt you big-time.”
She just looked at him.
Yeah, what’s a snowball going to matter when it’s thrown at an avalanche, he thought.
“I can help, Joe,” she whispered. “No one would work harder or concentrate more on doing this than I would. Let me help find my daughter.”
“I’ll think about it,” he repeated. He signaled the waiter for the bill. “No promises.”
“And if I don’t find Bonnie by doing this, I may discover something that will help those other parents,” she said urgently.
“You don’t have enough on your plate? See, you’re already beginning to worry, and you haven’t even started.” He reached into his wallet and drew out some bills and threw them on the tray. “Finished?”
“I’d better be,” she said dryly. “I have an idea you’re about to scoop me up and throw me into the car.”
“It’s a possibility.” He stood up. “You’re backing me into a corner, and I have to get some space between us. You’re not going to stop. You’ll keep coming at me, won’t you?”
She nodded as she got to her feet. “I don’t give up easily.” She preceded him out of the restaurant and paused beside the car, gazing at the river. “You’ve been very kind to me tonight, Joe. You’re right, I’ll never forget what that woman said to me. But you made some of the sting go away. I’m very grateful to you.” She glanced at him as she got into the car. “And I’m sorry that I’m going to keep on giving you headaches. You don’t deserve it.”
He smiled. “I can take it. It’s nice of you to apologize in advance.” He ran around and slipped into the driver’s seat. “And this place is only fifteen minutes from your house. I can ward you off for that long.”
“I’m done for the night.” She added, “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
And she would, he realized, and keep on calling until she had the answer she wanted. He was only beginning to realize the ruthless determination that existed behind that fragile exterior. “I’ll make my own decision, Eve,” he said. “I won’t let you push me.”
“I won’t push. I’ll just remind you that there’s a decision to be made. And I have to keep you on track in case I have to take that other route.” She leaned back on the seat and wearily closed her eyes. “I’m so tired. But I learned a lot about you tonight. I know how strong you are. I know you have a balance of values that few people possess. I know there’s bitterness and independence and recklessness. You’ve told me that you could be violent, but you’re very protective of me. I feel as if I’m coming close to understanding you.”
“That doesn’t mean you can control me, Eve.”
“No, but it means I can argue and try to persuade.” She opened her eyes to look at him. “As friend to friend.”
But not as lover to lover.
Get used to it. Accept it. There was no telling how long it would be before she could even contemplate a relationship that held anything beyond the comfort of friendship. But he had made strides in understanding himself tonight. And he was beginning to know Eve as well. Eve, the person, not the object of this crazy fixation that had struck him the first time he had seen her. It was a relief that he actually liked Eve. He appreciated her courage, her discipline, her honesty, her lack of vanity.
What the hell would he have done if he’d found her a complete bitch? Would it have negated that instant powerful attraction? Or had he somehow sensed who and what she was, and that was the reason she had drawn him to her? Who knows? Love at first sight was all very well, but it was confusing as hell and out of his realm of comprehension.
“Love.” It was the first time that he had used that word even to himself. It was too sentimental and too much of a commitment. He didn’t know anything about