Realm of Light - Deborah Chester [41]
She stared at him, her eyes slowly widening. “Are you sure?”
He pointed. “There are the mountains. Up there is the glacier I used to ride across as a boy, loving the cold. I called it the top of the world.”
“Did you bargain with the Guardian for this?” she asked. “When you communed with it in silence, so that I could not hear what was said, is this what you asked for? Did you think I would be a willing party to this abduction?”
He stared at her, taken aback by her anger. “What?”
“Are you mad or arrogant or simply a fool?”
His bewilderment grew. “I don’t understand.”
“Don’t play the simpleton!” she cried, sending startled jackdaws bursting up from the treetops. “You tried to seduce me. You claimed to love me. Did you think that was enough to make me willing to run away with you?”
Finally he began to understand what she was saying. His own temper sparked. “I haven’t abducted you.”
“Haven’t you? I told you I wasn’t free. I thought that was clear.”
“Very clear.”
“Then why have you brought me here?”
“It was not my choice.” But even to himself, that defense sounded lame and clumsy.
“Wasn’t it?” She glared at him. “Then whose choice was it? We stepped through the gateway, and suddenly we are at the far end of the empire, in Trau, on your family’s land. How convenient. When you made me a part of you, I experienced your emotions. I know you desired to throw me over your shoulder and carry me off. Now you have, but you’ll regret it. You—”
“I didn’t carry you off,” he broke in, equally angry now. “You are wrong about everything.”
“Am I?”
“You witnessed my talk with the Guardian. You heard.”
“Then explain this trickery!”
“I can’t. I thought we would come out on Sidraigh-hal, just as you did.”
“Then why are we here?”
“I don’t know!” he shouted. “In Gault’s name, I don’t know. Do you think I have forgotten your obligations? Do you think I have ceased to care that the empire is under attack by Tirhin’s new friends? I know how important it is to reach the main imperial army and make certain of its loyalty.”
His fist crashed against his breastplate. “Do I not still wear armor? Do I not still wear the insignia of the Imperial Guard? Have I forsworn my oath of service?”
“You said you would not serve me again.”
He saw tears shimmering in her eyes, but her face was still angry, still doubtful. His own temper, goaded now, would not be quelled by a few womanly tears.
“And now you think the worst of me, that I am a barbarian and a liar.”
“I don’t know what to think!” she burst out. “You change and shift, saying one thing, doing another. You insisted I trust you, and now—”
“We escaped the shadows. Isn’t that enough?”
“But look at where we are! Why can’t you understand, Caelan, that I don’t want to be safe, kept far away from the conflict? I want to keep my throne!”
Her words rang loudly on the cold air. A strange expression crossed her face, and she fell silent, pinching her mouth into a thin line as though her own admission had frightened her.
His anger fell away. “I know,” he said quietly. “I understand. But I swear to you I have not betrayed you. I did not bring you here by design. If the Guardian looked into my thoughts and sent me here to cause me more grief and heartache than before, then it succeeded. Believe me, Majesty, this is the last place I would go.”
She stared at him. “You are not happy to return to your home, to your family?”
He met her gaze without flinching. “My family is dead,” he said flatly. “My home was burned to the ground. I have been away six years. What is there to return to, but ghosts and bad memories?”
With a frown, she drew her cloak tighter around her, shivering and saying nothing.
Caelan returned his gaze to the mountains and felt suddenly light-headed, as though the argument had taken all the strength from him. Poor Elandra was frightened, lashing out without thinking. He must reassure her instead of arguing with her. Just then, however, he could find no words.
Gate of Sorrows,