Reaper Man - Terry Pratchett [47]
It told him, Return. You have work to do. There has been a mistake.
The figure faded.
Bill Door nodded. Of course there had been a mistake. Anyone could see there had been a mistake. He’d known all along it had been a mistake.
He tossed the overalls in a corner and took up the robe of absolute blackness.
Well, it had been an experience. And, he had to admit, one that he didn’t want to relive. He felt as though a huge weight had been removed.
Was that what it was really like to be alive? The feeling of darkness dragging you forward?
How could they live with it? And yet they did, and even seemed to find enjoyment in it, when surely the only sensible course would be to despair. Amazing. To feel you were a tiny living thing, sandwiched between two cliffs of darkness. How could they stand to be alive?
Obviously it was something you had to be born to.
Death saddled his horse and rode out and up over the fields. The corn rippled far below, like the sea. Miss Flitworth would have to find someone else to help her gather in the harvest.
That was odd. There was a feeling there. Regret? Was that it? But it was Bill Door’s feeling, and Bill Door was…dead. Had never lived. He was his old self again, safe where there were no feelings and no regrets.
Never any regrets.
And now he was in his study, and that was odd, because he couldn’t quite remember how he’d got there. One minute on horseback, the next in the study, with its ledgers and timers and instruments.
And it was bigger than he remembered. The walls lurked on the edge of sight.
That was Bill Door’s doing. Of course it would seem big to Bill Door, and there was probably just a bit of him still hanging on. The thing to do was keep busy. Throw himself into his work.
There were already some lifetimers on his desk. He didn’t remember putting them there, but that didn’t matter, the important thing was to get on with the job…
He picked up the nearest one, and read the name.
“Lod-a-foodle-wok!”
Miss Flitworth sat up in bed. On the edge of dreams she’d heard another noise, which must have woken the cockerel.
She fiddled with a match until she got a candle alight, and then felt under the bed and her fingers found the hilt of a cutlass that had been much employed by the late Mr. Flitworth during his business trips across the mountains.
She hurried down the creaking stairs and out into the chill of the dawn.
She hesitated at the barn door, and then pulled it open just enough to slip inside.
“Mr. Door?”
There was a rustle in the hay, and then an alert silence.
MISS FLITWORTH?
“Did you call out? I’m sure I heard someone shout my name.”
There was another rustle, and Bill Door’s head appeared over the edge of the loft.
MISS FLITWORTH?
“Yes. Who did you expect? Are you all right?”
ER. YES. YES, I BELIEVE SO.
“You sure you’re all right? You woke up Cyril.”
YES. YES. IT WAS JUST A—I THOUGHT THAT—YES.
She blew out the candle. There was already enough pre-dawn light to see by.
“Well, if you’re sure…Now I’m up I may as well put the porridge on.”
Bill Door lay back on the hay until he felt he could trust his legs to carry him, and then climbed down and tottered across the yard to the farmhouse.
He said nothing while she ladled porridge into a bowl in front of him, and drowned it with cream. Finally, he couldn’t contain himself any longer. He didn’t know how to ask the questions, but he really needed the answers.
MISS FLITWORTH?
“Yes?”
WHAT IS IT…IN THE NIGHT…WHEN YOU SEE THINGS, BUT THEY ARE NOT THE REAL THINGS?
She stood, porridge pot in one hand and ladle in the other.
“You mean dreaming?” she said.
IS THAT WHAT DREAMING IS?
“Don’t you dream? I thought everyone dreamed.”
ABOUT THINGS THAT ARE GOING TO HAPPEN?
“That’s premonitions, that is. I’ve never believed in ’em myself. You’re not telling me you don’t know what dreams are?”
NO. NO. OF COURSE NOT.
“What’s worrying you, Bill?”
I SUDDENLY KNOW THAT WE ARE GOING TO DIE.
She watched him thoughtfully.
“Well, so does everyone,