Redgauntlet [82]
two or three days'--
'They must be devoted to close study, Alan--very close study indeed; for ye must stand primed for a hearing, IN PRESENTIA DOMINORUM, upon Tuesday next.'
'I, sir?' I replied in astonishment--'I have not opened my mouth in the Outer House yet!'
'Never mind the court of the Gentiles, man,' said my father; 'we will have you into the Sanctuary at once--over shoes, over boots.'
'But, sir, I should really spoil any cause thrust on me so hastily.'
'Ye cannot spoil it, Alan,' said my father, rubbing his hands with much complacency ; 'that is the very cream of the business, man--it is just, as I said before, a subject upon whilk all the TYRONES have been trying their whittles for fifteen years; and as there have been about ten or a dozen agents concerned, and each took his own way, the case is come to that pass, that Stair or Amiston could not mend it; and I do not think even you, Alan, can do it much harm--ye may get credit by it, but ye can lose none.'
'And pray what is the name of my happy client, sir?' said I, ungraciously enough, I believe.
'It is a well-known name in the Parliament House,' replied my father. 'To say the truth, I expect him every moment; it is Peter Peebles.' [See Note 4.]
'Peter Peebles!' exclaimed I, in astonishment; 'he is an insane beggar--as poor as Job, and as mad as a March hare!'
'He has been pleaing in the court for fifteen years,' said my father, in a tone of commiseration, which seemed to acknowledge that this fact was enough to account for the poor man's condition both in mind and circumstances.
'Besides, sir,' I added, 'he is on the Poor's Roll; and you know there are advocates regularly appointed to manage those cases; and for me to presume to interfere'--
'Whisht, Alan!--never interrupt the court--all THAT is managed for ye like a tee'd ball' (my father sometimes draws his similes from his once favourite game of golf); 'you must know, Alan, that Peter's cause was to have been opened by young Dumtoustie--ye may ken the lad, a son of Dumtoustie of that ilk, member of Parliament for the county of --, and a nephew of the laird's younger brother, worthy Lord Bladderskate, whilk ye are aware sounds as like being akin to a peatship [Formerly, a lawyer, supposed to be under the peculiar patronage of any particular judge, was invidiously termed his PEAT or PET.] and a sheriffdom, as a sieve is sib to a riddle. Now, Peter Drudgeit, my lord's clerk, came to me this morning in the House, like ane bereft of his wits; for it seems that young Dumtoustie is ane of the Poor's lawyers, and Peter Peebles's process had been remitted to him of course. But so soon as the harebrained goose saw the pokes [Process-bags.] (as indeed, Alan, they are none of the least) he took fright, called for his nag, lap on, and away to the country is he gone; and so? said Peter, my lord is at his wit's end wi' vexation, and shame, to see his nevoy break off the course at the very starting. "I'll tell you, Peter," said I, "were I my lord, and a friend or kinsman of mine should leave the town while the court was sitting, that kinsman, or be he what he liked, should never darken my door again." And then, Alan, I thought to turn the ball our own way; and I said that you were a gey sharp birkie, just off the irons, and if it would oblige my lord, and so forth, you would open Peter's cause on Tuesday, and make some handsome apology for the necessary absence of your learned friend, and the loss which your client and the court had sustained, and so forth. Peter lap at the proposition like a cock at a grossart; for, he said, the only chance was to get a new hand, that did not ken the charge he was taking upon him; for there was not a lad of two sessions' standing that was not dead- sick of Peter Peebles and his cause; and he advised me to break the matter gently to you at the first; but I told him you were, a good bairn, Alan, and had no will and pleasure in these matters but mine.'
What could I say, Darsie, in answer to this arrangement, so very well meant--so very vexatious
'They must be devoted to close study, Alan--very close study indeed; for ye must stand primed for a hearing, IN PRESENTIA DOMINORUM, upon Tuesday next.'
'I, sir?' I replied in astonishment--'I have not opened my mouth in the Outer House yet!'
'Never mind the court of the Gentiles, man,' said my father; 'we will have you into the Sanctuary at once--over shoes, over boots.'
'But, sir, I should really spoil any cause thrust on me so hastily.'
'Ye cannot spoil it, Alan,' said my father, rubbing his hands with much complacency ; 'that is the very cream of the business, man--it is just, as I said before, a subject upon whilk all the TYRONES have been trying their whittles for fifteen years; and as there have been about ten or a dozen agents concerned, and each took his own way, the case is come to that pass, that Stair or Amiston could not mend it; and I do not think even you, Alan, can do it much harm--ye may get credit by it, but ye can lose none.'
'And pray what is the name of my happy client, sir?' said I, ungraciously enough, I believe.
'It is a well-known name in the Parliament House,' replied my father. 'To say the truth, I expect him every moment; it is Peter Peebles.' [See Note 4.]
'Peter Peebles!' exclaimed I, in astonishment; 'he is an insane beggar--as poor as Job, and as mad as a March hare!'
'He has been pleaing in the court for fifteen years,' said my father, in a tone of commiseration, which seemed to acknowledge that this fact was enough to account for the poor man's condition both in mind and circumstances.
'Besides, sir,' I added, 'he is on the Poor's Roll; and you know there are advocates regularly appointed to manage those cases; and for me to presume to interfere'--
'Whisht, Alan!--never interrupt the court--all THAT is managed for ye like a tee'd ball' (my father sometimes draws his similes from his once favourite game of golf); 'you must know, Alan, that Peter's cause was to have been opened by young Dumtoustie--ye may ken the lad, a son of Dumtoustie of that ilk, member of Parliament for the county of --, and a nephew of the laird's younger brother, worthy Lord Bladderskate, whilk ye are aware sounds as like being akin to a peatship [Formerly, a lawyer, supposed to be under the peculiar patronage of any particular judge, was invidiously termed his PEAT or PET.] and a sheriffdom, as a sieve is sib to a riddle. Now, Peter Drudgeit, my lord's clerk, came to me this morning in the House, like ane bereft of his wits; for it seems that young Dumtoustie is ane of the Poor's lawyers, and Peter Peebles's process had been remitted to him of course. But so soon as the harebrained goose saw the pokes [Process-bags.] (as indeed, Alan, they are none of the least) he took fright, called for his nag, lap on, and away to the country is he gone; and so? said Peter, my lord is at his wit's end wi' vexation, and shame, to see his nevoy break off the course at the very starting. "I'll tell you, Peter," said I, "were I my lord, and a friend or kinsman of mine should leave the town while the court was sitting, that kinsman, or be he what he liked, should never darken my door again." And then, Alan, I thought to turn the ball our own way; and I said that you were a gey sharp birkie, just off the irons, and if it would oblige my lord, and so forth, you would open Peter's cause on Tuesday, and make some handsome apology for the necessary absence of your learned friend, and the loss which your client and the court had sustained, and so forth. Peter lap at the proposition like a cock at a grossart; for, he said, the only chance was to get a new hand, that did not ken the charge he was taking upon him; for there was not a lad of two sessions' standing that was not dead- sick of Peter Peebles and his cause; and he advised me to break the matter gently to you at the first; but I told him you were, a good bairn, Alan, and had no will and pleasure in these matters but mine.'
What could I say, Darsie, in answer to this arrangement, so very well meant--so very vexatious