Rutland Place - Anne Perry [36]
Caroline recollected her manners and the purpose of their visit.
“We will not stay long,” she said, “because this is not a time for social visits, but both Charlotte and I were concerned to know how you were and if there was anything we could say or do to be of comfort to you.”
For a moment Eloise seemed almost not to understand her; then comprehension flooded her face.
“That is very kind of you.” She smiled at them both. “I cannot think that I feel it more deeply than we all do. Poor Mina. How very suddenly the whole world can alter! One minute everything is as usual, and the next enormous and dreadful changes have taken place and are as complete as if years had gone by.”
“Some changes are just the results of appalling accidents.” Charlotte dared not miss an opportunity to press for knowledge; it was too important. “But others must have been growing all the time. It is just that we did not recognize them for what they were.”
Eloise’s eyes widened, momentarily confused, seeking to understand Charlotte’s curious remark.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m not quite sure,” Charlotte hedged. She must avoid seeming to pry. “Only I suppose that if poor Mrs. Spencer-Brown took her own life, then it can only have been a tragedy that had been growing, unknown to us, for some time.” She had intended to be far more subtle, but Eloise was so candid herself that Charlotte could not play word games with her as she might have with someone more devious.
Eloise looked down at the folds of her skirt arranged over her knees.
“You think Mina took her own life?” She pronounced the words one by one, very clearly, weighing them. “That seems rather a cowardly thing to do. I always thought of Mina as stronger than that.”
Charlotte was surprised. She had expected more pity, and more understanding.
“We don’t know what pain she was faced with,” she said rather less gently. “At least I don’t.”
“No.” Eloise did not look up, a flash of contrition in her face. “I suppose we seldom even guess at anyone else’s pain—how big it is, how sharp, how often it cuts.” She shook her head. “But I still think that taking one’s life is a kind of surrender.”
“Some people grow too tired to fight anymore, or the wound is greater than they can overcome,” Charlotte persisted, wondering at the back of her mind why she was defending Mina so hard. She had not especially liked her; indeed she had felt a greater warmth for Eloise.
“We do not know that poor Mina took her own life,” Caroline said, intervening at last. “It may have been some sort of horrible accident. I cannot help believing that if there had been something distressing her so dreadfully, we would have been aware of it.”
“I cannot agree with you, Mama,” Charlotte replied. “Do you think that was what happened, Miss Lagarde? You knew her quite well, did you not?”
Eloise sat without answering for several seconds.
“I don’t know. I used to think I knew all the obvious things, and heard most of the gossip one way or another, and imagined I could evaluate its worth. Now . . .” Her voice trailed away and she stood up, turning her back to them, and walked over to the garden window. “Now I realize that I knew almost nothing at all.”
Charlotte was about to press her when the door opened and Tormod came in. His glance went immediately to Eloise at the window, then to Charlotte and Caroline. There was anxiety in his face, and his body was stiff.
“Good afternoon,” he said politely. “How kind of you to call.” His eyes went to Eloise again, dark and troubled. “I’m afraid Eloise has taken this appalling tragedy very hard. It has distressed her till she is quite unwell.” There was a warning in his face to be careful, choose their words, or they might add to the burden.
Caroline murmured understandingly.
“It is a very dreadful affair,” Charlotte said. “A person of sensibility would be bound to feel for everyone concerned. And I believe you were the last