Shadows Return - Lynn Flewelling [151]
“No more, talí. You’ve gone pale, yourself.”
“I feel a little shaky,” he admitted. “But look!”
For the first time, the rhekaro’s face and the quick of his nails showed the faintest tinge of pink. His eyes were darker silver now, too, almost the color of steel.
Seregil cupped Alec’s chin and inspected him closely. “You look different, too. More like your old self.”
“It’s like he’s pulling the Hâzadriëlfaie out of me,” Alec whispered, hugging himself and shivering harder.
Seregil fetched the water skin and made Alec drink, then sat behind him and pulled Alec against his chest to warm him. Sebrahn climbed into Alec’s lap and cuddled against him.
Alec hugged the rhekaro close. “He doesn’t feel quite so cold now.”
Seregil wound a strand of silvery hair around one finger. “I wish you could talk, little one. There’s more to you than meets the eye, and I’d be a lot happier if I knew what it was.”
“Maybe there’s more Ilar hasn’t told us,” said Alec.
“Maybe.” Seregil rested his unbruised cheek against the side of Alec’s head.
He relaxed back against him, glad for a moment of peace. Any anger he’d felt toward Seregil was gone. They were all in a miserable situation.
“What was all that shouting?”
“I just told Ilar to stay away from you.”
“You threatened him.”
“I just told him to leave you alone.”
“Good.”
Alec turned to look at him. “You really mean that?”
“Ah, Alec.”
“I wasn’t the one calling him ‘friend.’”
“I loved him once. You know that. And then I hated him.”
“And now you pity him.”
“I wish I didn’t. But I swear to you, talí, you have no reason to be jealous.”
“I’m not jealous of him!”
Seregil smiled sadly. “Just as I’m not jealous of Sebrahn?”
“You don’t—Wait, where is Ilar?”
“I’m here.” The man joined them and crouched beside the fire, chaffing his hands over the flames.
“I heard what you said before,” he told them dully. “I’ve told you everything I know about the rhekaro. I don’t care if you believe me or not. It’s the truth. What reason would I have to lie now? You were right, Alec. It’s only because of you two I’m alive, and I’m grateful for that. Just take me out of this cursed country. After that, I’ll fend for myself.”
Alec watched him closely through this little speech, alert for any false notes. But all he saw in Ilar’s red-rimmed eyes was resignation, and—when he spoke of going off on his own—fear.
By sundown everyone was warm, dry, and somewhat rested. Alec had managed to sleep again with Sebrahn safely beside him. He woke smiling from a dream of Seregil’s long fingers caressing the nape of his neck, but the moment didn’t last. Ilar had interrupted them before they could really settle anything between them and now Seregil sat on the far side of the fire, looking sad. He looked away quickly when he realized Alec was awake.
Miserable, Alec sat up to feed Sebrahn. “Do you think we can reach the coast tonight?”
“If not tonight, then tomorrow for certain,” Seregil said as he parceled out the last of the rabbit meat and an apple for each of them.
Alec ate his portion very slowly, aware of the silence underlying the words. He wanted to grab Seregil, tell him he understood that all Seregil felt for Ilar was pity, but the words backed up in his throat as Alec pictured the two of them there by the stream.
He did trust Seregil! So why couldn’t he let go of this?
“Maybe I can find us some rabbits here. It’s better country for it,” he offered, hoping to get a response, but his talimenios just stared into the fire, as if he knew Alec’s thoughts.
“Better that than snake,” Ilar remarked with a weak smile.
“Too cold for snakes now,” Seregil told him, rising to his feet. “We’re more likely to find a village, or at least a decent farm. Hunger always sharpens my thievery skills.”
As soon as it was dark, they cleaned up their camp, then took off their boots and walked down the streambed as far as they could bear, feet going numb in the icy