Skulduggery Pleasant_ Death Bringer - Derek Landy [127]
“Its head, then. Did you get a good look at its head?”
“What, like, would I be able to pick it out in a line-up?”
“I’m just looking for basics here.”
“OK, well, let’s see. It had… I’m not too sure if it had any eyes, and I didn’t see a nose, as such. But it had a mouth. A very big mouth, with teeth, teeth as sharp as needles. But I may have imagined that bit.”
“The teeth bit?”
“No, I may have imagined the mouth. I’m not sure if it had a mouth. It probably did. Everything has a mouth, right?”
“Unfortunately,” Scapegrace muttered.
“It would need a mouth if it was going to eat Reggie. That only makes sense, doesn’t it? Yes. It had a mouth. I’m sure of it now.”
One of the zombies held up his hand.
“What?” said Scapegrace irritably.
“Hi,” the zombie said. “Uh, I’m Keith? From the…? You bit me?”
“I can’t remember every single person I bite,” Scapegrace said, even though he could, because it really wasn’t very many, all things considered. “What do you want, Keith? Why is your hand up?”
“I was just wondering,” Keith said, “if there really are monsters down here?”
“There are a few, yes,” Scapegrace said. “No one knows how many, or what they’re called. All anyone knows is that they’re pretty impervious to magic, so… so don’t use magic. Not that you could, because you’re mortal. Or, you used to be. Anyway, magic attracts them.”
“Um,” said Keith.
“What now?”
“When you… remember when you bit me? And I woke up, and I was all, oh, what’s happening? And your friend explained it?”
“He’s not my friend,” said Scapegrace.
“I’m his second-in-command,” explained Thrasher.
“Oh, OK, sorry,” said Keith. “Anyway, he told me I was a zombie now, and that magic was now sustaining me and everything, and all that’s fine, but does that mean that now we will attract all the monsters because we have magic inside us, or am I just talking complete nonsense?”
Scapegrace looked at him. Oh, hell.
“Right,” Scapegrace said loudly. “Everyone fall in, and pay attention.”
Thrasher joined the horde, and Scapegrace looked at them like a general might survey his troops.
“We have been charged with a mission. We are deep in enemy territory. In order to achieve our objective, we must pass through hostile terrain. Keith is absolutely right. Our very presence here will attract the monsters.”
The horde gaped at him, suddenly terrified. Scapegrace pressed on.
“So we will move! Like lightning! And we will arrive at our destination and we will engage the enemy! In years to come, they will speak of this battle and they will speak of the sacrifice we made here! They will speak of the brave Army of the Undead, the horde that turned back the tide, who fought with everything that is in them to make this world our world! I have seen the faces of our enemies! I have looked into the eyes of our foes! Do you know what I have seen?” Scapegrace snarled, making them wait for the revelation. “Faces and eyes, gentlemen. Faces… and eyes.”
The horde frowned at him, and Scapegrace realised he had lost track of his speech. Panicked, he continued. “We do what we must. We do what we can. We do what we will. We do what we… we don’t do what we won’t.”
“Uh…” someone said.
“What will you give?” Scapegrace roared. “What will you give for one chance, just one chance, to say to your enemies this far, and no further?”
“Who are our enemies again?” someone asked.
“Are you with me?” Scapegrace screeched.
“Not really.”
“Are you with me?”
“I’m with you!” Thrasher squeaked excitedly.
“Is anyone apart from Thrasher with me?” Scapegrace hollered. He decided it was best not to wait for an answer. “Then let’s go! Let’s fight! Let’s show them what it means to die!”
Roaring, Scapegrace charged for the tunnel, Thrasher at his heels. After a moment, the horde started jogging after them. They ran through the darkness and the swaying light, and now some of the horde were joining in with the roars, and by the time they reached the end of the tunnel they were a charging mass of fury