Sloppy Firsts_ A Jessica Darling Novel - Megan McCafferty [29]
I wondered about jurisdiction—whether he could be prosecuted in the United States for a crime that occurred south-of-the-border. (Ha. In more ways than one.) But Hy was so matter-of-fact about it that Sara’s face was turning all sorts of colors. It kind of reminded me of a Mexican sunset. Or a tequila sunrise.
"Well, I wouldn’t press charges anyway," said Sara.
"Oh, I didn’t think you would." Hy glanced at me as she casually sipped her Red Bull. For the first time, I read her mind.
"Your parents might," I said, picking up where Hy left off. "You know, if you got knocked up or diseased or something."
"Omigod! So now you’re going to start in on me too?"
"What about Fly?" attacked Manda. "He’s nineteen. Rape. Right?"
Sara smiled at Manda for coming to her defense, then shot Hy a So, there! look.
"Who says Fly and I are having sex?"
There was an awkward moment of silence. Then Sara turned her attention to Bridget.
"And what are you going to do when Burke turns eighteen, Bridge?"
Bridget had been sidelining this whole conversation. Her pretty face squished with annoyance for being dragged into it against her will.
"Who says Burke and I are like, having sex?"
I just about fell down with shock. Bridget’s devirginization was a foregone conclusion in my mind, and apparently everyone else’s. I figured Bridget had been giving Manda and Sara the passion play-by-play all along. I was wrong. Their suntans drained from their faces.
Unfortunately, La Aventura Mexicana de Manda y Sara was still open for discussion. As if the blow-by-blow (pun intended) account of their trip weren’t bad enough, our Spanish teacher was so eager to hear about their journey to her homeland that she let them take up class time to tell us all about it. Of course, Señora Vega got the censored version.
"The Mexican people are so welcoming of Americans," said Manda.
"Sí!" said Sara.
"And their culture is so rich with tradition," said Manda.
"Sí!" said Sara.
How they managed to keep a straight face is beyond me.
In the middle of all this, Scotty passed me a note saying: They party for a week and we have to sit here and listen to them talk about culture? B.S.! I turned and mouthed, "I know!"
This was a breakthrough for Scotty and me. He usually doesn’t stoop to my cynical level. Maybe I never paid enough attention before.
Still, no one missed me more than Pepe. I’ve forgiven him for that brief period when he was too busy basking in the post-talent-show glow to toss one Bonjour! my way. Today he couldn’t stop spinning around in his seat to smile at me. Madame Rogan got tired of shouting, "Tournez-vous, Pierre!" ("Turn around, Pierre!") and moved him a few rows away from me. He waved good-bye and dramatically said, "Je suis triste. Au revoir." ("I’m sad. Good-bye.") Everyone laughed, but not in a mean-spirited way because Pepe gets away with stuff like that. It was funny. But I felt like I was going to cry.
April 1st
Hope,
Just to reinforce the lessons learned in our last phone call: Sara is a skank. Bridget is still a virgin. Manda is too, but she might as well not be because—in my totally unsubstantiated opinion—oral is way more intimate than real sex.
Did I mention that Hy hasn’t done it either? It’s more than a little unbelievable, but why would she lie? I’ll take her word because knowing such a hip virgin makes me feel like less of a leper for being one too.
I like Hy. But she always refers to NYC as "the city," as if it were the only metropolis on earth. And to further show off her cosmopolitan superiority, she tries too hard to be both "street" and "elite." She doesn’t pull off either one. Hy was the poorest student at her private school, but she clearly picked up the POVs of her high-society schoolmates. She’s got an opinion on everything and she just has to share them.
Pineville doesn’t have Latin classes? How do they expect you to rock the SAT verbal section without Latin? There’s no girl’s lacrosse team here? It doesn’t matter if there’s zero interest. Two words: Title IX. This year’s school musical is South