Snow Blind - Lori G. Armstrong [86]
“You sure this won’t hurt you?”
“No.”
Not the answer I wanted. My gaze connected to his across his battered body.
“But I’d rather take the chance it’ll hurt than play it safe and feel nothing.”
I had to look away.
He relaxed into the mattress, giving me control. It humbled me, having this man’s unwavering trust. I used my hands, my mouth, my constant caresses to create his mindless pleasure. I took him over the edge and greedily returned for more, gorging on the dark, raw taste of him. Fueling my need with his.
“Julie.”
“Ssh. Let me.”
By the time he was hard and ready for round two, a desperate-edged hunger crackled between us like lightning.
And still I would not be rushed. Or denied my prize. 306
I straddled his pelvis, careful to keep my knee from nicking either his injured rib or his leg and putting an end to this before it began. Aligning his sex with mine, I played a game of tease and retreat. Recently our trysts were fast, intense, and frequent—not that I had any complaints—but I craved the unhurried, sweet intimacy we’d denied ourselves in our usual blaze of lust-fueled passion.
“Julie. Please.”
Was I hurting him? I quit moving. “Want me to stop?”
“No.”
“What?”
“You don’t need to go slow for me.”
I paused. “Maybe I need to go slow for me.”
He said nothing.
I studied him, bared before me. The tiny beads of sweat formed on his brow. The arc of his long, dark eyelashes. The warm breath expelled from his nose in shallow bursts. The slash of color across his high cheekbones. The set of his jaw and mouth, especially the ripeness of his lips. His face was a perfect mix of male ferocity and masculine beauty—an iron-willed man. A man strong enough for me.
Was I strong enough to bare everything to him?
I planted my hands flat on the mattress beside his head, angling my body so we were face to face as well as skin to skin.
“Tony. Look at me.”
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His lashes fluttered and he locked his gaze to mine. Everything I’d ever wanted was right there in his eyes.
“I’m done playing it safe with you.”
He cradled my face in his shaking hands. “Meaning what, blondie?”
“Meaning, I love you.” One push and he was
buried deep inside me. I kissed him with the zeal I always did, but it seemed different. Truer somehow. Martinez groaned. His hands slid over my skin and clamped on my ass as I rocked into him. The world fell away.
And oddly enough, my world finally felt right. After Martinez dozed off, I ventured into the living area for a cigarette. Big Mike knocked four times and I let him back in the suite. Once the locks were secured, I realized he’d come alone. He pointed to the bedroom. “Asleep?”
“Yeah. What’s up?”
“I need to talk to you.” He closed the bedroom door, unnecessarily, because I figured the soundproofing in the apartment would keep our conversation private. “Remember the night Martinez was shot and you asked if we needed you to track down Jackal? Turns 308
out we do.” Big Mike shot a quick look over his shoulder at the door. “But bossman can’t know about it.”
With the brutal honesty I’d just given Martinez, now I was supposed to lie to him? Christ. What bad things had I done in a past life? Because the universe fucking hated me. “Why not?”
“He’ll see anything as a danger to you.”
“Is it?”
“Maybe. Jackal expects Tony to handle vengeance personally. Which is what Jackal wants and I’m sure it’s what Tony’s planning. You helping us track Jackal down is letting us take care of the problem and protects bossman, which is our job.”
“Wouldn’t that be going against Martinez’s direct orders?”
“We protect him even against himself.” Big Mike squinted at me. “So, you in?
Jackal wearing a toe tag was beneficial to everyone, no matter who pulled the trigger. “Yeah. But fair warning. If Martinez catches us, I’m rolling on you. I won’t fuck up my relationship with him for anyone or anything.”
“Deal.”
“I take it you have an idea where Jackal might be?”
“No. But Nyla does.