South of Superior - Ellen Airgood [126]
“Oh,” Madeline said, looking dismayed.
Paul transferred his attention to Greyson. “I’ll miss you, kid.”
Greyson nodded, biting his lip.
“I’ll write to you. You write back, tell me how you’re doing. I’ll call, too.”
“But you aren’t moving away for good, right? It’s just for the winter?” Greyson looked at him anxiously, and Paul didn’t know what to say. A lot of people went away for the winter, for work or warmer weather, it wasn’t unusual. It’d be easier for Greyson to think that. And by the time spring came—maybe he’d have forgotten Paul, more or less. Didn’t kids do that? Bounce back, adjust?
“Yeah, I might be back in the spring.”
Madeline was frowning, and he knew what she was thinking. Don’t get his hopes up if that isn’t true, he’s had enough disappointments. Just be honest. That was fair, but Paul couldn’t do it. Faced with leaving the boy, the lie made Paul feel better too, was the truth of it.
Greyson scrambled from his rocker. “I’m going to get you something to take with you. Wait, I’ll be right back.”
Paul nodded.
“I’m sorry too,” Madeline said quietly. “Gladys told me she heard you were moving, but I guess I didn’t believe it. You know how rumors are.”
“The damage is bad. You can see.”
“I know. But—don’t you have insurance?”
Paul didn’t want to talk about what insurance might or might not pay out, or how he might be able to rebuild. He was leaving, period. Part of him yelled No, stop, at every turn, but it was the only thing left to do.
“What happened?” Madeline asked when he didn’t answer her first question.
“The wind brought that old maple on the west side down. It’s my own fault. I should have had it taken down years ago. It was rotten at the core and I knew it. But I loved it. I loved the shade. And then there was a leak in the roof I never got around to fixing. The wall was pretty rotten, worse than I realized, and it just gave.”
Madeline grimaced in sympathy. “You were there, right?”
“Sleeping. The first crack of it breaking woke me Up.”
“Scary.”
Paul shrugged. “Yeah, well. It’s my own fault.”
“It was a wind,” Madeline protested. “A wind like the wind that sank the Fitzgerald, is what Gladys said.”
“I knew that tree was rotten. I knew the roof was leaking. I just didn’t do anything about it. I deserve whatever I get for being so stupid.”
“You can’t blame yourself, it doesn’t do any good,” Madeline said. She knew this from experience.
“It’s a miracle it didn’t happen a long time ago. This was just so damned Unnecessary.”
Madeline saw that he was not going to be talked out of his guilt and regret. She reached Up and took his hand. “I’m really sorry.”
He’d heard this so many times that he couldn’t respond to it again.
“Hey,” she said, shaking his hand to get his attention. “I mean it.”
“I know,” he said, staring off across the water.
“Do you really think you’ll be back in the spring?”
He looked at her then. Her eyes seemed full of sympathy, a willingness to Understand. “I don’t know. The truth is, I was thinking about going anyway.”
Madeline took her hand back and poked her needle in and out of the fabric of Greyson’s shirt a few times. Without looking Up she said, “Greyson’s going to hate this.”
“Me too.” Paul rubbed the back of his hand against his face, then took off his glasses and scrubbed at his eyes. He thought about taking off, avoiding this. But no, he had to wait for Greyson.
“You’ve been so much help.”
“No big deal.” He could hardly get the words out.
“Ha. All that drywall! And the time you spend with Grey. This will be hard.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m going to miss him like crazy.”
“Randi was in such a bad mood the other day. I guess this is why.”
Paul looked at the top of Madeline’s head, her short dark hair, the curve of her neck. He swallowed back a feeling that wanted to burst out of him, an emotion that would interfere with the course he’d laid out for himself in the last few days. “Randi got rid of me awhile back.”
Madeline’s head shot Up then, and her expression was gratifyingly baffled. “What? Why? You have to be