Spirit Bound - Christine Feehan [65]
“What happened?” His voice was a thin thread of sound directing her, barely infiltrating the memory she was locked so tightly in.
“They all turned on each other. It was a horrible bloodbath, the sound of guns so loud, reverberating off the walls. Men were screaming and shouting.” She gulped air, her eyes wild now, her body shaking. Judith lifted her palms up and looked down at them, as if her hands and arms were covered in her brother’s blood.
Her voice dropped to a whisper. “The police arrived.”
Her eyes went nearly opaque, reflecting back at him the horror of that moment. He could see blood running down the walls to pool on the floor. Blood splattered over her face and clothes where she knelt beside her lifeless brother, his body torn, nearly unrecognizable as human.
“I was in shock, I think. I can’t remember thinking anything at all. I just felt. So much anger. So much darkness. I hated Jean-Claude. I still hate him. But worse, the pain of losing Paul that way, it was so vivid and stark and raw, I couldn’t contain it.”
She obviously wasn’t aware tears were running down her face as she blinked to clear her vision, to see him. She shook her head, confusion on her face. “I don’t remember what I was doing. I try, but I can only hear the sound of the policemen yelling at one another. I tried CPR on my brother, but his chest and head were covered in blood and it kept splashing over my arms and hands. The sound was so awful.” She clapped both palms over her ears, nearly hyperventilating.
Stefan rose, his movement quiet and very slow. She was locked deep into the memory of that moment and her emotions were, like then, out of control. The wind rushed through the house. Drapes went wild. He knew she didn’t see, didn’t see the fierce battering at him as she relived her brother’s murder. Very gently he caught her wrists and tugged to bring her hands to his chest, stepping close to her. Her body was cold, hands like ice.
“The police have arrived, Judith.”
She let out a small gasp, looking up at him with dazed eyes. “One of them came close to me, to try to help me, I guess.” She frowned, looking as if she were more confused than ever. “There was so much blood. So much pain. I felt so much sorrow. I wanted to take his place, to be where he was. I was so sorry for what I’d done, so guilty that . . .”
He waited, needing to hold her, wanting to put a stop to this, but knowing it wouldn’t matter. She would always have these moments etched into her memories for all time.
Judith swallowed several times, opened her mouth and closed it, gulped air and bunched his shirt in her fists as if she needed him to be her anchor. “The officer pulled out a gun and put it to his head. He shot himself, right there, before anyone knew what he intended. He was standing next to me, one moment reaching down to help me and the next his blood was everywhere and his body fell right on top of mine.”
Stefan closed his eyes briefly, the sorrow so heavy in his heart that he felt crushed. He knew it was her sorrow, her body crushed beneath the dead policeman. For a man who had lived most of his existence with emotions firmly locked away, he was getting a crash course in real life with a woman a man loved. The picture of lying in her brother’s blood with the innocent policeman’s body on top of hers, was all too real in his mind. For the first time in more years than he could remember, he wanted to weep for another human being.
Stefan pulled her rigid body into his arms, sweeping away her resistance with sheer strength. He held her tight, willing his body heat to seep into her, to warm her and bring her back from a place of death and despair. His hands slid into her mass of hair, bunching the silky strands in his fist, massaging her scalp with strong fingers.
“Come back to me, Judith. You’re safe with me now. You can scream if you