Spirit Walk_ Old Wounds (Book 1) - Christie Golden [66]
Finally, he turned to her. “All right. But I want you there. I want him to hear it from us both.”
Astall let out a gusty sigh of relief and had to almost physically stop herself from hugging him.
“Let’s go.”
Chakotay was surprised to hear from both his counselor and his doctor, but agreed to meet them in his ready room.
“So, what’s this all about?” he asked as the door hissed closed behind them. He indicated the sofa and they sat, perched uneasily on the edge. They exchanged glances.
Finally, Kaz spoke. “Chakotay—Damn, this is hard to put into words.” Chakotay waited patiently. Kaz hesitated, searching for an opening, and finally said, “You know about Gradak.”
“Your symbiont’s previous host? The Maquis? Of course. What about him?”
“Remember we talked a little when you came in for your physical?”
Comprehension dawned. So that was why his physician and his counselor wanted to see him in private….
“Ah,” Chakotay said. “He’s doing more than stirring a bit then, is he?”
“It was my suggestion,” Astall blurted out. “I thought it might help if we brought Gradak’s memories to the forefront and let him tell us what happened to him. It’s almost as if Jarem was suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder that wasn’t his own.”
Kaz clasped and unclasped his hands. Chakotay wanted to set his friend’s mind at ease, so he said, “Isn’t there some sort of ritual that the Trill perform to isolate the personalities of the former hosts?”
“The zhian’tara,” Jarem replied. “It’s a pretty complicated ritual and takes some time to prepare for. It’s not something we can do here and now, but Astall did bring Gradak to the forefront of my thoughts.”
“The problem is,” said Astall, “there ought to have been plenty of time for Jarem to finish the guided meditation, hear Gradak out, and then rest and recover. Gradak would have been satisfied, and Jarem would no longer be distracted.”
“But we got to Loran II too fast for that,” said Chakotay, nodding.
“Yes,” said Kaz. “And while I feel completely capable, Astall thought that you should know what’s going on with me. And upon reflection, I think she was right to insist. It’s your call, sir.”
Chakotay looked from one to the other, considering. He was no stranger to spirit walks, which were very similar to what Kaz had undergone with Astall. But this was different; the spirits didn’t accompany you back to the “real” world the way Gradak obviously had.
“So you feel competent to perform your duties, Kaz?”
“I do, sir.”
“Even with a dead Maquis knocking around in your skull?”
Kaz had to smile a little at that. “Even so, sir.”
Chakotay nodded. “Astall, what’s your professional opinion?”
“Right now, I think the doctor is fully capable, sir. I’ll keep an eye on him, and the moment I think he’s not, I’ll relieve him of duty.”
“I’d relieve myself first, sir,” Kaz said, quickly and earnestly.
“Okay,” said Chakotay. “Here are my thoughts. I trust you both. Astall, if you agree with Jarem that he is fit to continue with his duty, then I have no problem with him doing so. But I do want you to keep an eye on him.”
Kaz relaxed slightly. Astall flopped back onto the sofa with a loud “Whew!” Chakotay grinned.
“I only thought that being on the away team might distress the doctor somewhat. Not that I didn’t think he could handle it,” she added swiftly.
“Well, that won’t be an issue,” said Chakotay. “The away team has already left.”
“What?” Kaz’s voice was loud and sharp. “You’re not leading it? And I’m not going?”
“Me either?” piped up Astall.
“I thought that I’d give it to Pri—to Ellis. And he didn’t seem to think he’d need either of you.”
Kaz stared at him. “Chakotay, with this storm messing up our sensors, you can’t be certain they’re accurate. How do you know there won’t be wounded down there?”
“It was Ellis’s call. Not the call I’d make, but frankly, we lost contact with the colonists several months ago. I don’t think anything we discover will be an emergency situation.” He looked at them intently. “Do you?”
Sighing, Kaz shook his head. “Unfortunately,