Star Trek_ Generations - J M. Dillard [6]
Jims unease had begun with a restless night of troubling dreams; and in the fleeting second as he stared at the seam in the lift doors, he was haunted by dimly colored images from the night before, from dreams that had been strands of memory braided with imagination:
Yosemite. E1 Capitan. Climbing, gripping cool rock with his fingers, his hands, breathing in sweet Terran air, gazing out at hawks flying past. Spock appearing out of the literal blue, distracting him, and then:
The fall, just as it had happened those years ago, so swiftly that it shoved the air from his lungs, made him dizzy as he flailed, clawing vainly at smooth rock …
Abruptly, the superimposed flash of himself seated at the campfire beside Spock and Bones, explaining why he had not been afraid.
… even as I was falling, I knew I wouldnt die, because the two of you were with me …
Captain, Spock said, as the setting shifted again, and they were on the Enterprise-A in Jims quarters, on his last night as captain. I shall be returning to Vulcan.
And then he was falling againfalling into infinity, past El Capitan, over the Arabian Peninsula with the air roaring in his ears, waiting for Spock to catch him.
But Spock was goneon Vulcan and Bones was nowhere to be found, either. Jim was alone for the first time really alone, terrified and in free fall. Even so, he heard the doctors voice whisper in his ear: Miss you, old friend
And then, the question Bones had asked Spock so long ago, on the Klingon Bird-of-Prey soon after the Vulcan had returned to the living: What did it feel like, being dead?
Ridiculous, to be so unsettled by dreams. Kirk gave his head a slight shake and detached himself from the memory. Self-pity was useless; it might seem wrong that Spock and McCoy were not here beside him but he was grateful for Scotty and Chekov, the two friends who flanked him now. He glanced at them and saw that Chekovs apprehension matched his own, while Scotts expression was one of wistfulness, mixed with an overwhelming curiosity about the turbolifts new design.
Yet despite his resolve to forget last nights dreams, he felt his unease grow. The only thing that felt comfortable about the whole affair was the chance to wear his uniform again.
The lift doors opened onto blinding light and applause. Dazzled, Kirk blinked until his vision cleared to reveal a holocam with spotlight, a bevy of journalists with padds, and the applauding bridge crew. He forced a gracious smile, and felt Scott and Chekov tense self-consciously beside him.
Captain Kirk, one of the reporters called, how does it feel to be back on the Enterprise bridge?
The question was the only one he could make out clearly amid the sudden barrage: Captain, could I have a min
Captain Scott, do you have any comment on the
Commander Chekov, after seeing the new Enterprise, do you regret
Blessedly, a uniformed figure pushed forward through the crowd and stepped in front of the light. Kirk knew even without looking at the insignia who it would be; authority conferred a certain confident grace, a determined manner of walking that marked a captain on his own bridge. And a tension that permeated the air around him. Like a coiled spring, Jim thought. Was I ever that intense?
Excuse me, the man told the reporters as he strode past them. Excuse me, there will be plenty of time for questions later.
The journalists at once fell silent, and receded like a tidemall except the cameraman, who angled himself for a better picture, throwing the light directly