Star Wars_ I, Jedi - Michael A. Stackpole [164]
“Oh.” I sipped some of the ale and let the carbonation attack my tongue. The ale soured in my mouth, but I knew it wasn’t anything to do with the brewing. I didn’t like the idea of Remart with Admiral Tavira, and turned to glower at him.
Caet let a low growl roll from her throat. “Jealousy does not suit you, Jenos.”
I looked at her, blinking in surprise. “Jealous? Me? Of Remart? No way.”
Timmser shook her head. “Got it bad, pretty clearly, Jen.”
“No, you’re wrong.” I frowned at the both of them, then drank. I tried to tell myself I didn’t like the idea of them being together because Remart would cause trouble for me with Tavira. “With Tavira backing him, Remart will be a terror.”
Timmser gave me an exaggerated nod. “I copy, Captain Idanian, but I think your sensor data is reading wrong.”
Caet agreed with a smile. “Seek the truth, Jenos. Don’t fly blind.”
My frown deepened as I considered the possibility of being jealous. I knew it was insane. I didn’t want her—I had Mirax and was very happy. I’d refused her, and I could easily see her turning to Remart as both a way to salve her ego and to get under my skin, since our dislike for each other was well known. Yet even though I didn’t want her, I wanted her to be with him even less.
I am jealous!
I shivered. Part of me knew my jealousy was all preprogrammed and genetic. By winning a female, a man guaranteed his own genetic survival, and all other men are de facto rivals in that quest for immortality. As much as I wanted to believe I was removed from my animal nature—as much as I clung to Yoda’s dictum that we are not crude creatures of matter—I still didn’t like Remart. I also had a powerful attraction to Leonia Tavira.
I had to admit it. Part of the reason I’d cut her proposition short was because I did find her desirable. She was easily classed as eye-candy, and her cunning enhanced her attractiveness. Her capriciousness was dangerous, but that very danger was a challenge: Could I, in relating with her more closely, avoid her wrath?
Before letting myself follow that line of thought, I pressed my mug of cold ale up against my right cheek and let the chill soothe the fire there. I felt more of a sting as some of the ale slopped down over the abraded flesh, but I let it remind me of Tavira’s petty and venial side. Am I so far gone here that I truly want her? It drove a sting like a vibroblade into any desire I had for her. I hoped it had left a mortal wound, but I wasn’t sure of it.
Caet sniffed once in my direction. “Your face. Who?”
I lowered the ale and gave her a good view of the welt. “Remart’s playmate. She didn’t like my answer to some of her questions.”
Timmser swirled brandy around in a snifter, then smiled. “I answered them and all I got was a headache.”
“Yeah, well, I told her I had a headache, and got lashed for it.”
“Not wise.” Caet leaned forward. “No pity for Remart. For you, fear.”
“Don’t fear for me, Caet.” I shook my head. “And don’t do it around Tavira. I think she can smell fear and can smell weakness. Stink of either one around her and you might as well chew a blaster bolt—it will be quicker and just might not hurt as much.”
THIRTY-NINE
The new raid promised to be easy and probably did not require the show of force we were going to haul along, but I hated it. Admiral Tavira had decided we were going to travel to the Algara system. We weren’t going to hit the main world, Algara 2, even though the bureaucracy-bound planetary administration probably couldn’t mount a defense. Instead we were heading for the first world in the system, Kerilt, a jungle world whose only colony was far from self-sufficient.
It was this lack of self-sufficiency that made Kerilt a prime target. The colony, Morymento, was home to one of the larger Caamasi Remnant communities in the galaxy. Well back before I was born, right after the Clone Wars, the world of Caamas was brutally attacked and hit with enough firepower that the vegetation boiled