Star Wars_ Luke Skywalker and the Shadows of Mindor - Matthew Woodring Stover [9]
“Yeah, I’ve seen ’em.” Han grinned as he fished a handheld holoplayer out of the dejarik console and tossed it onto the table. “Bought it a couple months ago. Gives me something to do while I’m waiting for Leia to wrap up negotiations somewhere or just, y’know, finish her hair.”
“No hair jokes, Solo,” Leia said. “I’m not kidding.”
Luke picked up the player and thumbed the controls over to the title page. Luke Skywalker and the Dragons of Tatooine. “Oh, will you look at this junk?” He shook his head disgustedly and tossed it back to Han, who snagged it neatly from the air. “That’s what I mean. It’s all—just so stupid.”
“What, there’s no dragons on Tatooine?”
“Sure,” Luke said. “Krayt dragons. And they’re dangerous enough, especially if they catch you alone—but look at that illustration! Not only have I never fought one with my lightsaber from bantha-back, I can flat-out guarantee that krayt dragons do not breathe fire!”
“Come on, take it easy, Luke.” Han hefted the reader, smiling fondly. “These’re for kids, y’know? And I gotta tell you, some of ’em are actually pretty good.”
“Especially the ones about you,” Leia muttered darkly.
Luke stared. “Are you putting me on?”
Han shrugged, flushing a little—but just a little; he was constitutionally immune to embarrassment. “You’re not the only hero of the Republic, y’know.”
“Han—”
“Ask him how much he gets paid,” Leia said.
“You get paid?”
“Hey, I’m not a Jedi.” Han’s hands came up as if he was half expecting Luke to throw something. “I, ah, worked out a licensing deal with a couple holoshow producers. After Yavin. You understand.”
“I do?”
“If he does,” Leia said, “maybe he can explain it to me.”
“It was Lando’s idea.” Han was starting to sound defensive. “All right, look, I got into this deal before I really knew what I was doing. The stuff’s pretty bad, but it’s harmless. Han Solo and the Pirates of Kessel, Han Solo in the Lair of the Space Slugs …”
“It’s not harmless.” Luke set his jaw. “Have you seen the one they call Luke Skywalker and the Jedi’s Revenge?”
Han looked dubious. “I thought Jedi don’t get into revenge.”
“They don’t—I mean, we don’t. I don’t know what I mean. They have me slaughtering my own father—to avenge the death of Palpatine! It’s just—so sick.”
“Take it easy, Luke. So the writers spice things up a little. What’s the harm? A little wham-bam just makes you look tough, you know?”
“That’s not how I want to look.”
“People need heroes—and stories like these are the way heroes become heroes.”
“I thought heroes became heroes by doing something heroic.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I do. And that’s part of my whole problem. Everybody’s watching me. It’s like they’re trying to figure out who I’ll turn out to be. And trying to figure out a way to turn a profit on it.”
Han spread his hands. “That’s what keeps the galaxy spinning, buddy.”
“Maybe it does,” Luke said. “But I don’t have to be part of it. Maybe that’s what feels so wrong about being a general. It’s like, I don’t know, like I’m pushing myself forward. Like somehow I talked Ackbar into this so I could go on being larger than life.”
“You are larger than life, Luke. That’s what I keep trying to tell you.”
“Being a general … sending other people into places where they have to take someone’s life or get killed themselves …” Luke shook his head again. “Playing the hero when you’re in charge just gets a lot of people hurt.”
“Who’s playing?”
“Luke, this commission is a wonderful opportunity, and not just for you,” Leia put in. “Force powers aren’t the only kind of power, and there are ways of helping people that are a lot more effective than hitting something with a lightsaber. As a Jedi, you might save the occasional, well, princess in distress or some such, but as a general, you can save thousands of lives. Millions. The Defense Force needs you, Luke.”
“I can’t beat you