Star Wars_ Millennium Falcon - James Luceno [85]
“That he was going to hurt me.”
Leia blinked in consternation. “Jacen would never have hurt you, Allana. He loved you so very much. He would have changed the galaxy for you if he could.”
“Why?”
“To protect you from harm—from any evil.”
Allana seemed to consider it.
“Do you miss him, Allana?”
Allana looked away again. “A little. Sometimes.” She turned to face Leia. “Do you wish he was still alive, Grandma?”
A lump formed in Leia's throat. “I'm sorry he had to die.”
So very sorry.
“Was he sick?”
Leia nodded. “He was sick. But not like when your stomach hurts. He was … he had a kind of sickness in the Force.” Someday Allana would have to be told the full story, in all its gruesome and tragic details, but now wasn't the time.
“Can the Force get sick?”
“No. But beings can use the Force in a way that endangers others.”
“Is that the dark side?”
“Perhaps. And one path to the dark side is anger. Another is hate. That's why I scolded you when you ran from the room and you wanted to hurl the Force at Seff.”
Allana fidgeted. “Was Jacen angry?”
“Jacen was very angry.”
“What was he mad at?”
“He was mad at not being able to have his way.”
“I get mad sometimes when you tell me to stop doing something,” Allana said quietly.
“We all get mad sometimes,” Leia said. “But getting mad in that way, getting frustrated or feeling like you should be able to do something, is not the same as filling yourself up with anger and hatred and letting those emotions take control of your thoughts and actions.”
“It makes you see red,” Allana said, brightening somewhat.
“When anger fills you up enough, you can see red, and that's not good for you or for the Force.”
Allana linked her arms about Leia's neck. “I'm not mad now. Just a little sad. That's what I was telling Muzzle when you came in.”
“What did Muzzle say back?”
“That being sad is stupid.”
Leia hugged her. “Muzzle is wrong. It's not stupid. Sometimes we can't help feeling sad.”
Han rapped on the jam of the open hatch. “Okay to come in?”
Leia whispered: “Is it okay?”
“Come in, Grandpa,” Allana said.
He stepped into the cabin. “I've reached Luke.”
Leia let go of Allana and stood up in a rush. She started for the doorway, then stopped. “Do you want to speak to Uncle Luke after I finish speaking with him?”
“Uh-uh.”
Han grinned at Allana. “I sure could use some help piloting the ship.”
Allana smiled and jumped up.
“What should I do, Captain Solo?” C-3PO asked from the ring corridor.
“I want you to keep searching the comlink nets for Dax Doogun.”
“The odds of my locating him—”
“Threepio—please?” Allana said.
“We'll even let you connect to the cockpit comm suite,” Han said.
C-3PO straightened. “In that case, I'll continue the search.”
Holding hands, Allana and the droid set off for the main hold.
“How does Luke seem?” Leia said when Allana was out of earshot.
“Melancholy.”
“When are you two going to break down and install a holoprojector aboard the Falcon?” Luke asked when Leia had settled herself at the engineering console in the main hold.
“We don't have enough problems with the ship already?”
“Point taken,” Luke said.
To Leia's eyes he looked not just melancholy but haunted. The comm showed him to be communicating from Coruscant.
“Han says that the search has been interesting.”
Small talk, Leia thought, but what was the harm?
“We traced the Falcon to two men who owned it before Lando,” she told him. “But we may have reached a dead end.”
“You're returning to the Core?”
“Assuming something doesn't come up.”
Luke stirred. “You wanted to let me know about Seff.”
Leia smiled faintly. “You can read my mind from that distance?”
“If you wanted me to. But there was no need. Galactic Alliance Intelligence gave me the full story.”
“Luke, Allana told me that Seff reminded her of Jacen. She couldn't articulate the reason. But she felt that he posed a danger to her.”
Luke withdrew for a moment. Leia could almost feel him absorbing the news. Did his face pale, or was it simply the comm connection?
“Seff has given Daala another reason to distrust us,” Luke said.