Star Wars_ The New Rebellion - Kristine Kathryn Rusch [50]
Have you ever thought, sweetheart, that you’re the one who’s being unfair?
She frowned at Han’s imaginary voice, just as she had frowned at him when he said that. The Empire had been their enemy; always would be.
But the Empire was dead.
Then who set off the bomb?
It angered her that the investigations were going more slowly than the elections had. She had hoped that the criminal or criminals would have been brought to justice by now. But it seemed the more she studied this, the more out-of-control she was.
The secret to using your powers, Leia, is to let go of what you know. Let the Force guide you. Luke’s voice was as clear as if he were in the room. Several giddy times, in his exercises, she had parried all the attacks of the seeker remote while blinded. She had fought in a number of battles, feeling the Force flow through her and guide her. Luke claimed that she had done the same in diplomatic situations, although she had not felt that way.
Perhaps she would have to do that now.
She pushed herself off the bed. Letting go of those emotions was harder than anything she had tried. Since she was eighteen years old, she had fought the Empire. It had destroyed her home, murdered her beloved father, and given her a twisted birthright from an evil man, a birthright she had tried to cleanse by naming her youngest son after that evil man’s good side. She had been tortured, shot, and wounded in explosions. She had lost friends over and over again to the Empire.
And now she was expected to coexist with them.
Someday we must move beyond Rebellion and into true government. Mon Mothma’s words. Perhaps Mon Mothma was the person to move them to true government. She had laid the foundations. Her strengths were in persuasive abilities, and in her talent at looking long-term.
Leia rubbed her hands on her torn military pants. She was unwilling to give up any symbol of her Rebellion. The Rebellion had replaced all that had existed before. The Empire had destroyed her home and friends. The Rebellion had given her a new home, new friends. The Empire had murdered her family. The Rebellion had given her a new family.
She couldn’t abandon that. She couldn’t let go. For if she let go of her hatred for the Empire, she might lose the love she had found in the Rebellion.
Mon Mothma had the ability to set those passions aside.
But that had been part of the reason she had stepped down.
Our leadership must be strong and dynamic. We need someone like you, Leia.
Strong and dynamic. Full of passion.
Full of anger.
Fear, anger, and hatred belonged to the dark side. How many times had Luke told her that?
And where was Luke? Chasing some phantom. Just as Han was. Her children were on Anoth, Winter with them. Whenever Leia needed guidance, the people closest to her were gone.
The house computer bonged.
Her irritation flared. “I told you that I didn’t want to be disturbed.”
“Just so, madam,” said the house computer, using Han’s voice but not his syntax. Leia’s irritation fled in the face of her amusement. Anakin had been messing with the controls again. “But you have a persistent visitor who claims that he is here with a dire emergency. He threatened to disassemble my circuits if I did not contact you.”
“Really?” she said, unable to reconcile the words with the voice. “Does our mysterious visitor have a name?”
“He claims to be one Lando Calrissian.” Anakin not only had tampered with the computer’s voice, he also had tampered with its memory. The computer should have recognized Lando’s name at least. Good thing the little mechanical whiz wasn’t home, or he’d get a hearing from Leia. Of course, he would just blame Jaina, who often wasn’t completely blameless in all of this. The difference was that Jaina meticulously covered her tracks.
“Let me see a visual,” Leia said.
A holographic projection of a man hovered before her face. He wore his