Stolen Innocence - Lisa Pulitzer [175]
“I ask, write this down, the Lord told me to say and I yearn for everyone’s forgiveness for my aspiring and selfish way of life, in deceiving the elect, breaking the new and everlasting covenant, and being the most wicked man on the face of the earth in this last dispensation.”
Warren’s voice cracked with emotion as he concluded his message. “I ask for everyone’s forgiveness and say farewell forever, you who are worthy for Zion, for I will not be there.”
I felt a bit sorry for Nephi, who now choked back tears and assured Warren that he would make it to Zion. Overwhelmed, Nephi clutched the receiver, unable to move as Warren hung up and turned to leave the room. It had taken Warren almost an hour to deliver these few words. We could see by his actions that he’d wrestled with himself, hanging up the phone, then picking it back up again several times, even at the very end, when Nephi tried to console him.
“This is a test. You are the prophet,” Nephi said, his voice shaking.
Warren again took the receiver. “This is not a test; this is a revelation from the Lord, God of Heaven, through his former servant—who was never his servant—who is dictating these words at this time, that you may know, this is not a test.”
Finally, after remaining paralyzed by the reality of his own admission, Warren knocked on the door of the visitors area to alert guards that he was ready to return to his cell. He exited the room, and Nephi remained behind, looking shattered by the new possibility that everything he’d believed in his life was a lie. I recognized the look on his face, for I had felt that way once before. Tears gathered in his eyes and he remained as if glued, with his back pressed up against the wall, for almost five full minutes, perhaps waiting for Warren to come back and tell him it was all just a test. But that didn’t happen.
Lamont and I were beside ourselves. We’d long known Warren’s devious nature, but to hear him openly profess his deceit and fraud left us speechless. While we had ceased believing in his power more than a year ago, both of us still bore the psychic scars from his treatment. To have him acknowledge that the whole thing had been a lie was at once liberating and revolting. I felt dirty thinking of all of the times he’d used my heart against me and the people he had praying for him back in Short Creek—the people he’d taken advantage of, who might never know the truth.
We wanted to reveal the footage to the FLDS people so they could make their own choice about the authenticity of their prophet, but the video recording would be ordered inadmissible at trial. In spite of Warren’s wishes that it be distributed for mass consumption, the defense argued that releasing the tape would poison the potential jury pool and prejudice a jury. As such it was kept under wraps for the duration of the trial.
Several days after Warren’s unexpected confession, we got word that he’d attempted to commit suicide by hanging himself in his cell. He was discovered by jail guards and taken to a local hospital for treatment and evaluation. Warren had long prophesized that he would die a martyr in an attempt to align with Joseph Smith, the founder of the Mormon Church, who died in prison terrorized by an angry mob. Authorities were adamant that they would not let this happen, and every precaution was taken to ensure his safety and well-being. During his lengthy incarceration at Purgatory, he’d been performing ritualistic fasts for days at a time and spent hour upon hour on his knees praying, leaving them cracked and bloodied.
All of these revelations instilled an unwavering certainty in Lamont and me that we were doing the right