String Theory_ Fusion (Book 2) - Kirsten Beyer [27]
Tuvok’s hand released the metal support he had grasped, and he felt the wind knocked from his lungs as his upper body slapped back to the floor. Alone in the cold blue darkness, he began to weep.
As he tidied up Naomi’s spilled milk, Neelix affectionately considered his beautiful and good-natured charge. He couldn’t believe how quickly she was growing up. It seemed like only yesterday she had been cradled in his arms, a wriggling cooing slice of pure joy. Most of the time, he counted Naomi as one of the greatest blessings he had ever received. But as part of his brain fretted over the disruption that had overturned her milk, he felt a pit of concern tighten in his stomach again.
Much as he loved Naomi, and much as he could no longer imagine his life without her, he had to acknowledge that no starship, even one as marvelous as Voyager, was any place for a child.
Before Naomi was born, he’d never understood the affection others had for children. He had long ago resigned himself to a solitary existence, which had changed only when he met Kes. He had even summoned the courage to agree to have a child with Kes when the elogium had come upon her prematurely. But he hadn’t been able to hide from Kes or himself the niggling doubts that shrouded that difficult decision. To this day he believed that they had both been relieved when the elogium had passed, and the Doctor had assured them that she would probably be able to conceive in a few years, as was normal for an Ocampa.
But Kes was gone. The life that he had imagined for both of them was a distant memory. Naomi hadn’t replaced Kes in his heart. That would have been impossible. But the love he had found in nurturing Voyager’s only child had been a soothing balm in the dark days after Kes had departed.
He watched her eat, satisfied that she was obtaining as least most of the nutrients her growing body needed from her lunch, and thumbed through the drawings she had worked on throughout the morning.
The one she had obviously spent the most time on was a copy of the starfield she had given to Captain Janeway that morning. He had barely been able to contain the deep pride that welled in his heart when Naomi had recounted in every detail her meeting with the captain and her request to hang Naomi’s drawing in her ready room. But Naomi had intended that drawing for her mother. She had been momentarily alarmed when she realized that by giving it to the captain, she would be denying this special gift for Ensign Wildman, and Neelix had tactfully resolved her dilemma by suggesting that she had plenty of time to make her mother another one before her duty shift ended late that afternoon.
Neelix had an eye for detail. It had been developed in his years as a “junk” trader, one of many occupations he had attempted before his fortuitous encounter with Voyager. One man’s junk was another man’s treasure, if you knew what to look for. As he cast his eye over Naomi’s new drawing, he puzzled over a large empty black area near the center. He couldn’t say for sure, but he believed that this was different from the first drawing he had so carefully helped her begin the night before and finish up that morning. Of course it was possible that Naomi had simply chosen to draw the stars of the Monorhan system from another vantage point, but the rest of the drawing was so close to the original that he doubted this was the case. And despite Naomi’s age, she had already shown herself to be an intensely detail-oriented child. He didn’t believe she had made a mistake. But he also had a hard time believing that a star that had been so prominent only a few hours earlier was simply no longer present.
He turned to look out one of the mess hall’s large windows, carefully studying the area of space Naomi had duplicated. Comparing her drawing with the stars,