Stupid White Men-- and Other Sorry Excuses for the State of the Nation! - Michael Moore [22]
Finally, I have to tell you how distressed I was when, back in that crazy week before the election, you hid behind your daughters as your excuse for covering up this conviction. You said you were worried that your history of drunkenness would set a bad example for them. A lot of good that secrecy has done, as proven by the twins’ various arrests this year for alcohol possession. In some ways, I admire their rebellion. They asked you, they begged you, they told you: “Please, Dad, don’t run for President and ruin our lives!” You did. It did. Now, like all good teenagers, it’s payback time.
Perhaps the news anchor on Saturday Night Live put it best: “George Bush said he didn’t reveal the drunk driving charge because of what his daughters might think of him. He had preferred that they think of him as a man with numerous failed business ventures who now executes people.”
Here’s what I suggest: Get help. Join AA. Take your daughters to Al-Anon. You will all be welcomed with open arms.
3. Are you a felon?
When you were asked in 1999 about your alleged cocaine use, you replied that you had committed “no felonies in the last twenty-five years.” With all we’ve learned about tricky answers in the last eight years, that kind of response could only lead a reasonable observer to believe that the years before that were a different story.
What felonies did you commit before 1974, George?
Believe me, I’m not asking this in order to seek punishment for anything you did. I am concerned that if there is some deep, dark secret you are hiding, you may in effect be providing ammunition for anyone who uncovers that secret—be it a foreign power (your current favorite, the Chinese) or domestic (like—oh, pick one—say, R.J. Reynolds). If they discover your history of a felony or felonies, they’ll have something to hold over you, putting them in a position to blackmail you. That makes you, George, a national security threat.
Trust me, someone will find out what you are hiding-and when they do, we’ll all be at risk. You have a duty to disclose the nature of whatever felony you imply that you may have committed. Only by revealing it can you neutralize its potential use as a weapon against you—or us.
Also, you recently made it a requirement for any young person seeking financial aid for college to answer a question on the application form that reads: “Have you ever been convicted for any drug offense?” If they have, they are denied student aid—which means that many of them will not be going to college. (Or, to put it another way, according to your new orders Sirhan Sirhan can still receive student aid, but a kid with a joint can’t.)
Doesn’t this move on your part strike you as a little hypocritical? You would deny a college education to thousands of kids who only did exactly what you have implied you did as a young person? Man, that takes some chutzpah! As you’ll be receiving $400,000 a year from us until 2004—from the same federal kitty that pays out the college aid—it seems only fair to make you answer the same question: “Have you ever been convicted of selling or possessing drugs (not including alcohol or tobacco)?”
We do know, George, that you have been arrested three times. Other than some peace-activist friends of mine, I don’t personally know anyone who has been arrested three times in their life.
In addition to the drunk driving, you were arrested with some fraternity brothers for stealing a Christmas wreath as a prank. What was that all about?
Your third arrest was for disorderly conduct at a football game. Now this I really don’t get. Everyone conducts themselves in a disorderly manner at a football game! I’ve been to many football games and have had many a beer spilled on my head, but to this day I’ve never seen anyone arrested.