Summer Secrets - Barbara Freethy [147]
"Can I come in?" she asked.
"Looks like you're already in." He took a swig of his beer.
She sat down on the edge of the couch, careful to keep some space between them. "I wanted to tell you I was sorry."
"Yeah, well, it's a little late, isn't it?"
"Yes. But I still mean it." She paused, not sure what to say now that she had a chance to say it. "Jeremy --"
"I don't want to hear any more lies about Jeremy," he said sharply.
"What about some truths?" she challenged. When he didn't reply, she continued, "Jeremy spent the last day of his life doing what he'd always done, taking care of Kate and her family."
"He shouldn't have been with you."
"I know, but he was. He was with the woman he loved, Sean. Those days before the storm hit were good ones for both of them. They were finally together. They'd wanted to be together for so long. I'm glad they had that time. And I think Jeremy was, too."
"He shouldn't have died."
"You're right. He shouldn't have died. He didn't deserve to die that night. But it was an accident."
"Your father pushed him"
"Not overboard. They were arguing, yes. And my father shoved Jeremy, but Jeremy hit his head, and the storm did the rest. The water crashing over the boat is what swept Jeremy over the side." She paused, taking a breath as she forced herself to relive that night. "I saw Kate jump into the water after your brother. And I helped my father try to rescue them both. I wish I could have done more. You don't know how much I wish that. I've blamed myself for not trying to get Jeremy while Dad was getting Kate, or not being able to spot Jeremy in the water. If only I'd done something differently, maybe the result wouldn't have been the same. Kate feels the same way, and I suspect my father does, too."
"Your father hated Jeremy."
"My father and Jeremy were a lot alike. They lived for the sea. They butted heads because they both cared deeply about what they were doing. Sailing and racing was as much a part of Jeremy as it was a part of my father."
"He still shouldn't have died," Sean repeated with a hitch in his voice. He rubbed a hand across his eyes. "He was so young. He had his whole life ahead of him. And he lost it for what? A stupid sailboat race."
"He didn't think it was stupid. He thought it was the most exciting thing he'd ever done in his life and the most exciting thing he might ever do. We spent a lot of time together at the various ports along the way. Jeremy loved what he was doing. If you don't believe anything else, I hope you'll believe that. He also loved you very much. He talked about you all the time to me. He knew I was missing you." She stumbled over the words as emotions swamped her. "I loved you so much, Sean. The only reason I broke up with you was because I couldn't stand to lie to you. I knew eventually we would come to this point, when you would look at me and know the truth, and you would hate me. It was inevitable."
She paused, wishing he'd say something, but he was staring at his bottle of beer. "Anyway, I just wanted to say I was sorry. I still love you, Sean, but I'm going to leave the island. I'm going away, so you don't have to look at me every day or, worse yet, try to avoid me. I want you to be happy. I really want that." She got to her feet, but he reached out and caught her hand in his. She looked into his eyes and saw what looked like forgiveness and so much more.
"Don't go," he said, pulling her back down on the couch. "Don't ever go." And his mouth covered hers before she could tell him that the last thing she wanted to do was leave ...
*
Kate rolled onto her side and ran her hand down the center of Tyler's chest. His eyes were closed, but she knew he wasn't sleeping. He'd already tensed with the slightest brush of her fingers against his skin. They'd made love twice already, but