Sun and Moon, Ice and Snow - Jessica Day George [57]
That night Rollo went out and mourned them in his own way, howling at the moon for hours. The lass lay in her bed and listened to the muffled sounds of his howls coming through the ice-paned window.
Chapter 22
The lass did not tell Hans Peter what had happened. His responses to her letters in the blank book were always terse, and she sensed that he was angry with her for being so curious and endangering the servants. She learned that her father was doing well, and could now walk with the aid of a crutch. The king’s physician had recommended lightly exercising the injured leg and arm, to strengthen them.
And then there was a puzzling letter from Tordis. Well, it was puzzling to Jorunn, at least. She reported to the lass via the magic book that Tordis wanted to know, urgently, if the lass had done what she had asked and used you-know-what to look at you-know-who.
I am completely at a loss, Jorunn wrote. But Tordis said that you would understand. She wants to know at once. As soon as you write to me, I am to write to her.
But the lass didn’t write “at once.” She had not done what Tordis asked. She still had the little stub of candle and the matches. The candle had given her a rash and made her nose itch, and she had stuck the candle and matches in one of the pockets she wore under her clothes. She supposed that she could use it at any time, but why? Tordis was convinced that she was in bed with a monster, but the lass was not so sure.
True, when she had asked Rollo to smell the hair she had found, it had carried a hint of troll. But he had also smelled bear and human, so it was hard to say which smell was more accurate. She herself smelled rather like bear, lately. And her nighttime visitor felt like a human. She had touched him, kicked him, and rolled against him by accident in her sleep. She thought that she would know if he were some hideous beast.
After lunch, she made up her mind to lie. She got out the little book and wrote to Jorunn: Tell Tordis yes, and all is well. There, the lass thought, that should soothe her sister for a time.
But then the guilt began to gnaw at her. She was lying to Tordis. And maybe her sister was right. Just because the back she had felt in the darkness seemed to be the back of a human man, that didn’t mean that it really was. And along with the magic that kept her from finding any candles or getting out of the room in the night, maybe there was an enchantment that made him feel human when really he was . . .
“A troll,” she breathed aloud.
As soon as the idea entered her head, it wouldn’t leave. This was a troll palace. Everyone raised in the North knew that the trolls had magic, terrible magic, and they played with the lives of other creatures like dolls. After what had happened to Erasmus and the others, she knew that as well as anyone. How could she have been so foolish? For all she knew, she was lying beside the troll princess herself! Perhaps the feeling that she was lying with a young human man was there to reassure her while the princess did . . . what? Sucked out her soul slowly over the course of a year? Made herself young by aging the lass? The lass had a name, but she had never been baptized—how much protection did her name really provide?
She ran into her dressing room and studied her face in the mirror there, but couldn’t see any difference. Well, that wasn’t quite true. She did look a bit older, but that was probably just from having traveled so far and seen so much. Her face had rounded out, but that was thanks to good meals.
“Well, it’s not that,” she said aloud.
“What are you doing?” Rollo came into the dressing room.
“I just thought that . . .” She let the sentence trail. Rollo would only be upset by her suspicions that a troll shared her bed. He would want to protect her, but there was no way that he could. At midnight every night, a deep sleep came over him that lasted until dawn. Even when he