Surfacing - Margaret Atwood [10]
I pick up some fly dope in a spray can for the others, also some eggs and bacon, bread and butter, miscellaneous tins. Everything is more expensive here than in the city; no one keeps hens or cows or pigs any more, it’s all imported from more fertile districts. The bread is in wax paper wrappers, tranché.
I would like to back out the door, I don’t want them staring at me from behind; but I force myself to walk slowly, frontwards.
There used to be only one store. It was in the front part of a house, run by an old woman who was also called Madame: none of the women had names then. Madame sold khaki-coloured penny candies which we were forbidden to eat, but her main source of power was that she had only one hand. Her other arm ended in a soft pink snout like an elephant’s trunk and she broke the parcel string by wrapping it around her stump and pulling. This arm devoid of a hand was for me a great mystery, almost as puzzling as Jesus. I wanted to know how the hand had come off (perhaps she had taken it off herself) and where it was now, and especially whether my own hand could ever come off like that; but I never asked, I must have been afraid of the answers. Going down the steps, I try to remember what the rest of her was like, her face, but I can see only the potent candies, inaccessible in their glass reliquary, and the arm, miraculous in an unspecified way like the toes of saints or the cut-off pieces of early martyrs, the eyes on the plate, the severed breasts, the heart with letters on it shining like a light bulb through the trim hole painted in the chest, art history.
I find the others in the small chilly room labelled BAR; they’re the only customers. They have six beer bottles and four glasses on their orange formica-topped table. A mottled boy with a haircut like the ones of the men in the store, only blonde, is sitting with them.
David waves at me as I come in: he’s happy about something. “Have a beer,” he says. “This is Claude, his father owns this joint.”
Claude shambles off morosely to get me a beer. Underneath the bar itself is a crudely carved wooden fish with red and blue dots on it, intended possibly for a speckled trout; on its leaping back it supports the fake marble surface. Above the bar is a T.V., turned off or broken, and the regulation picture, scrolled gilt frame, blown-up photograph of a stream with trees and rapids and a man fishing. It’s an imitation of other places, more southern ones, which are themselves imitations, the original someone’s distorted memory of a nineteenth century English gentleman’s shooting lodge, the kind with trophy heads and furniture made from deer antlers, Queen Victoria had a set like that. But if this is what succeeds why shouldn’t they do it?
“Claude told us business is bad this year,” David says, “on accounta word is around the lake’s fished out. They’re going to other lakes, Claude’s dad flies them in his seaplane, neat eh? But he says some of the men went out in the spring with a dragnet and there’s all kinds of them down there, real big ones, they’re just gettin’ too smart.” David is slipping into his yokel dialect; he does it for fun, it’s a parody of himself, the way he says he talked back in the fifties when he wanted to be a minister and was selling Bibles door-to-door to put himself through theological seminary: “Hey lady, wanna buy a dirty book?” Now though it seems to be unconscious, maybe he’s doing it for Claude, to make it clear he too is a man of the people. Or maybe it’s an experiment in Communications, that’s what he teaches, at night, the same place Joe works; it’s an Adult Education programme. David calls it Adult Vegetation; he got the job because he was once a radio announcer.
“Any news?” Joe asks, in a neutral mumble that signals he’d prefer it if I kept from showing any reaction, no matter what has happened.
“No,” I say, “Nothing different.