Sushi for Beginners - Marian Keyes [130]
‘It’s called a shell top.’
‘So what’s a blouse then?’
Ashling took him through the various options. ‘You must never, ever say “blouse” to any woman under sixty,’ she said gravely. ‘You can compliment a woman on her vest if you mean a sleeveless T-shirt. Not if it really is a vest. In fact if it really is a vest, I’d advise you to leave immediately.’
Marcus nodded. ‘I see. God, it’s a minefield.’
‘Hold on.’ It had just occurred to her. ‘Are you pumping me for info for your act?’
‘Would I do that?’ he smiled.
The food was unobtrusive, the talk was easy, but Ashling had the feeling that it was all a type of prelude. A trailer. With the main feature to come later.
When the bill arrived she made a half-hearted attempt to contribute.
‘No,’ Marcus insisted, ‘I’m having none of it.’
Because you expect to be having plenty of it later
Out on the street he asked, ‘What now?’
Ashling shrugged, then couldn’t help giggling. Surely it was obvious?
‘My place?’ he suggested softly.
He kissed Ashling in the taxi. And again in the hall of his flat. It felt very nice, but when they broke apart, she couldn’t help looking around, checking the place out. She fancied him, but she was also keen to see how he lived, to find out about him.
It was a one-bedroomed apartment in a modern block and the grunge factor was surprisingly low.
‘But it doesn’t smell funny!’
‘I told you, my Mammy trained me well.’
She turned into his living-room. ‘Look at all your videos,’ she gasped. There seemed to be hundreds lining the walls.
‘We could watch something if you like,’ he said.
She did like. Torn between attraction to him and childish nerves, she welcomed a delay.
‘Pick one,’ he invited.
But when she began scanning the shelves, she slowly realized something odd. Monty Python, Blackadder, Lenny Bruce, Laurel and Hardy, Father Ted, Mr Bean, The Marx Brothers, Eddie Murphy – they were all comedy videos.
She was confused. On their first date they’d had a lively discussion on their favourite films. He’d claimed to like a wide variety of stuff, but you’d never know it from looking at his shelves. Eventually she plumped for The Life of Brian.
‘An excellent choice, if I may say so, madam!’ He produced a bottle of white wine for her, a can of beer for himself, and they tentatively snuggled together in front of the telly.
Ten minutes into the film Marcus touched her bare shoulder with his index finger and began to stroke it slowly. ‘Asssh-liiing,’ he crooned with an intensity which flipped her stomach. Almost afraid, she looked at him quickly. He was staring at the screen. ‘Now watch carefully,’ he urged, in the same low tone. ‘One of the greatest comedy moments of all time is coming up.’
Mildly disappointed but ever obedient she paid attention and when Marcus dissolved into convulsions she couldn’t help laughing herself. Then he swivelled round to her and asked, like a cute little boy, ‘Would you mind, Ashling?’
‘What!?’ Sleeping with me?
‘If we watched that again.’
‘Oh! Not at all’
When her heart rate had slowed down to normal she decided she was touched that he wanted to share what was important to him.
‘So were they pleased about me saying I’d do the column?’ he asked, some time later.
‘Oh, delighted!’
‘That Lisa, she’s some piece of work, eh?’
‘Very persuasive.’ Ashling wasn’t sure how smart it would be to start slagging off Lisa.
‘You should get the credit for it, though.’
‘But I didn’t do anything.’
Marcus looked at her with meaning. ‘You could tell them you persuaded me when we were in bed together.’
The naked intent in his look made her throat seize up. Then she swallowed as if eating an oyster. ‘But that wouldn’t be true.’
A long pause, where his eyes never wavered from hers. ‘We could make it true.’
Her high spirits had worn off. Disappeared, in fact. It felt too soon to go to