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By Root 1829 0

been upon finding Samson and Chaney. My resolve had given me the confidence to be a boy, hadn’t it? To march along in broad daylight, booted, trousered, braced, behatted, full of purpose and showing it, like a man. Now we paused in the darkness and listened to noises, looked about us, caught each other’s glance and looked away, dreading the very dread we might see. When others passed us, we drew ourselves into ourselves, aiming to pass unnoticed, trying not to look as if we were ready to flee. Ladylike dignity was the key to safe passage, as boyish self-confidence had been before. And I got tired. Lorna didn’t. She said, "What’s de mattah wid ya? Ya slowin’ down!"

"I’m tired. It’s the middle of the night."

"No, it ain’. My guess, it ain’ pas’ ten. We got to go quick as we ken till daylight. We ken res’ den, though I ain’ goin’ to one o’ dem hotels again! I sweah, dat place was filthy! Missy Helen couldn’ have slep’ a wink deah!"

"I can hardly keep awake."

"I’m jes’ glad I is out in de country walkin’, ’stead o’ sewin’ on Massa Richard’s shirts by candlelight!"

"Is Master Richard a cruel master?"

"No."

"Did he ever beat you?"

"Not so’s you’d notice much. He aim for me wid his razor strap one time. He only yell a lot. He don’ evah beat de boys, ’cause he ain’ big enough. He buy dem off wid presents."

I laughed.

"Why you laughin’?"

"Because that’s not the way the northerners think slaves live."

"Slaves live all differnt. But dey all slaves. Dey all got to do what dey is tol’ to do."

"I didn’t see anyone tell you what to do much at Day’s End Plantation."

"Now you soun’ like Massa Richard. When I come back deah a year ago, he say, ’This place is heaven, Lorna! We all have our work to do and we do it, and then we receive our nourishment and our rest, and we rise to do our work again. It’s all the same for master and servant, Lorna. The world you want to get to is a far darker place than Day’s End Plantation!’ " Her mimicry of Papa’s intonation and way of expressing himself was perfect, and so I laughed again, but then I sobered up and said, "And so it is, Lorna. A woman I know and both of her little boys starved to death not far from me this past winter. I might have, too, but for a friend. What will you do, all alone?"

"I ain’ gone be all alone. My man is buyin’ hisself free."

"Couldn’t he buy you free?"

"Tek ’im twelve yeah to buy hisself! In twelve yeah, I ain’ gone be fit to have babies. Anyway, Massa Richard already done tol’ me dat he don’ want to sell me, ’cause I is de best trained and he cain’ get no one like me no more, wid de ablishinists and all. He say, ’We have to draw upon our own resources, Lorna. Not like former times!’ "

"You sound just like him."

"Well, I been heahin’ ’im talk since I war a youngun. Hush, now."

We quieted, and I could hear horses, more than one, trotting along. Without even thinking about it, I stepped over behind a tree, and Lorna stepped in beside me. We pressed against the tree and looked at each other, making no sound. The horses trotted by, two of them. One of the riders was saying, "... shoulda shot ’im a long time ago, but Halloran wouldn’t let me, haw haw!" It was a regret I had heard often enough—Missouri and Kansas were filled with folks who, in the opinion of other folks, would have been shot long before this if better judgment had prevailed. The horses trotted away, and when we could no longer hear them, we stepped out from behind the tree and resumed walking. I was no longer sleepy. I said, "Why shouldn’t you be a slave, Lorna? What if all those preachers are right, and the Lord says that Negroes are best in slavery?"

"’Cause I don’ want to be, an’ I know my own mine bettah dan dose preachahs know de Lawd’s mine, I think."

"Does my question insult you?"

"You is ignorant and you ain’ got good mannahs, but I don’ caeh. I is ignorant myself. I cain’ read and I cain’ write nothin’ but ’Lorna.’ An’ I ain’ got good mannahs, neider, ’cause I ain’ got de patience for ’em. Delia, she got good mannahs, an’ look wheah she got."

"Where did she get?"

"She got her baby